Storms

Keep Honking
I'm Reading Cormac McCarthy's Profoundly Influential 1985 Novel "Blood Meridian"

You know you're 44 years old when you're hanging out at the grocery store on a Friday night, singing along to a 1991 Phil Collins hit that's playing on the speakers and only buying things that you have coupons for

I just heard Usher's "Yeah!" absolutely BLARING outside my window, accompanied by a man shouting "DWP!" Apparently meter readings are equivalent to going to the club these days

Why are people still replying-all for no good goddamn reason in the year of our lord 2025

Listening to "I Just Called to Say I Love You" at CVS while getting 2 vaccine shots: 10/10

Listening to it while watching The Woman in Red (1984): 0.5/10

Male Science Fiction Writer Avoid Describing Nipples and Areolas in the First 2 Pages of Your Novel Challenge (Difficulty Level: Impossible)

a man in a white tank top is holding a pepsi bottle in his hand and says woahhh . Alt: A GIF of Nick Hexum, singer for the band 311, from the music video for the song "Amber," with the caption "WOAHHH"

I'm trying to do my civic duty and report a downed power line to 311 and it's taking 17 years for some reason??? Nick Hexum would be handling it so much faster than this

I never thought I would be at a point in my life where I'm fantasizing about finally getting home so I can eat my first meal of the day and it's cottage cheese, but here we are

I have a nightmare at least once a week about teaching a Pilates class where everything is going wrong 🙃

As much as I love to say "I told you so," sometimes it really sucks to be proven right.

Ran out of my usual razor cartridges and had to use one of these ancient relics I dug up from the Drawer Where Excess Toiletries Go to Die. I would have been better off going to the beach to find a clam shell to shave with, in terms of comfort and effectiveness

Searching for dopamine by reading the bad Yelp reviews of a business owned by a person I can't stand

Oldest radio station prank in the book.

I was jammin' to KLOS for like 45 minutes, which is an unusually long time, when I realized their station IDs had changed to "SoCal's Yacht Rock." I fell for it for about .75 seconds until I remembered what day it is. I wouldn't be mad at it though!

They say that if you laugh at your own jokes, it means you are either a genius or insane. I think I might qualify for both

How do you politely interrupt someone's conversation to say "Can you please disconnect your fucking phone from the Bluetooth speaker if you are not going to play music"

The runners-up are "Hotel California" and "Don't Stop Believin"

Werewolves of London. When I was 16, I caused a car accident because I was so distracted changing the radio station. Warren Zevon owes me money

FedEx thinks a package that's still in New Mexico as of 11:30 am will be "delivered today." Be fucking for real. What are these delusions of shipping grandeur

Don't invite me to a "white party," do you know how messy I am?!

Someone called me a "music genius" yesterday and I was like... you are WILDLY exaggerating but also can I put you down as a resume reference

I have not felt either of the last 2 earthquakes and I don't know if that's good or bad

Header and intro paragraph for 112 Women's Trivia Questions Ranked From Easiest to Hardest (Updated for 2024)

Question 7: What serial killer, who killed at least 30 young women in the 1970s, grew up in Tacoma, Washington and went to college at the University of Puget Sound and the University of Washington? Answer: Ted Bundy

I do not believe you understood the assignment, watercoolertrivia dot com

You know it's going to be a good month when one of the line items on your to-do list is just "Mezcal"

Since there's apparently going to be a plane crash every day now, are flight tickets getting any cheaper? 🤔

Looks like I picked the wrong week to quit sniffing glue

a woman is standing in a living room with the words and why is the carpet all wet todd ? ALT: a woman is standing in a living room with the words and why is the carpet all wet todd ?

I stepped in some water in the kitchen and asked myself out loud, "Why is the floor all wet?" and then immediately answered "I don't KNOW, Margo!"

Crypto guy in 2014: Crypto will revolutionize finance and change how we interact with money

Crypto in 2025:

"Inside" was basically a one-man show and it was incredible

He was in the new Nosferatu and I was like "omg! Is that Willem Dafoe?!"