Memos From Lofwyr

MEMO:

Due to complex maneuvers of draconic etiquette, I am temporarily caring for Lung’s cat.

Update the list of my sworn enemies to include Lung’s cat.

-L

#Shadowrun

MEMO:

Whoever is sending ominous threats to Senior Acquisitions Director Dubrovnik, please be a little less abstract. She received last week’s baseball-with-a-nail-through-it but is just confused, not frightened. If you are sending a message it’s lost in translation.

#Shadowrun

It’s not an uncommon strategy. -L

MEMO:

Mr. Lofwyr has bullet points for Marketing’s public apology -

* Sorry
* What is fashion if not a playground for fascistic, eugenicist fantasy anyway?
* How were we supposed to know you wouldn’t like it NOW?

#Shadowrun

MEMO:

This is a reminder that when you call the Company emergency line you need to speak clearly and concisely so security can properly assist you.

“Help us! It can open doors! [screaming]” does not provide any usable information for the response team.

#Shadowrun

Yes, the Kuching-Toronto axis has a long memory. -L

At this point the operation is considered a rescue mission, but be prepared. -L

IRREGULAR ASSETS:

The Arianespace lunar shuttle has made an unscheduled, unsanctioned landing somewhere in Borneo and disconnected all communications and transponder signals.

A team is required to locate the shuttle and retrieve all personnel aboard.

#Shadowrun #Plothook

MEMO:

The latest update on Project Muscipula is that it likes Concrete Dreams music. The security applications of this knowledge are as yet unknown.

#Shadowrun

IRREGULAR ASSETS:

I need a team capable of operating a funnel cake machine to accompany me to a certain home in Bellevue and make as much as the children want while I have a private word with their parents about just *who* embarrassed *who* at the company outing. -L

#Shadowrun #Plothook

MEMO:

Few things took the shadow-world by storm as completely as the Ares Viper Slivergun. Every chrome-job in Seattle had one for most of the 2050s until things reached equilibrium with body armor.

#Shadowrun

MEMO:

The trideo conversion of thousands of hours of pre-Awakening “professional wrestling” undoubtedly influenced the first generations of shadowrunners.

Take, for instance, the sad case of Ares executive Charles Kenwood who was killed by an “elbow drop” delivered from 15 stories up.

#Shadowrun

Thank heaven for small miracles. -L

MEMO:

I have never liked the “hotshot capitalist” archetype because they make some nuyen and then think they’re geniuses in general.

Example: Aidan de Kok felt the need to command his own mercs at the front lines and died hiding behind a minibar from a drone with a vindicator.

-L

#Shadowrun

MEMO:

I know everyone in Palma is in shock right now, but can we just note how clean those shear lines are? I mean, that’s amazing. Something that big you’d think wouldn’t tear that cleanly. Unreal.

Oh and don’t touch it.

#Shadowrun

MEMO:

The Matrix Disinformation Team is working very hard lately, Employees. If you see them be sure to say thanks for everything they do!

#Shadowrun

MEMO:

I am aware of the concert footage of two company executives in the midst of an affair. I am livid.

Saeder-Krupp holds its executives to a higher standard.

Effective immediately, executives failing to keep their affairs private will be subject to disciplinary action. -L

#Shadowrun

Get this thing out of my network. It’s interviewing all the IC programs, somehow. -L

MEMO:

If the media calls the top of that skyscraper blew off in the wind.

#Shadowrun

MEMO:

Best bioware I ever invested in were tailored adrenal glands. At their current “setting” they give me a boost when I need it but I can regulate output so there’s no chronic stress. It wasn’t cheap or easy, but essential when working for you-know-who.

#Shadowrun

MEMO:

I am not surprised often but I am surprised that Spinrad’s AI got that contract. I once asked it to summarize the Odyssey and it tried to bite me. -L

#Shadowrun

MEMO:

It is the position of the company that narcoject, while not technically an illegal drug, is still a violation of the company’s employee conduct policy when under its influence at work.

#Shadowrun

MEMO:

You know, I am recalling that a certain dragon entombed a vampire alive two ages ago and died before telling anyone where she was… That would be worth finding out. -L

#Shadowrun #Plothook

MEMO:

The following operations have been given the final green-light:

- Operation Teaspoon
- Operation Snakes & Ladders
- Operation Mrs. Tiggy-Winkle
- Operation Vinegar Chips
- Operation Hell Is Real And You Will Not Escape
- Operation Marmalade

#Shadowrun

MEMO:

The forensics report from Warehouse 216-C in Köln is in.

It has been determined that the damage to the ceiling was caused by an individual with embedded electromagnet cyberlegs attempting to drop a grenade from the central beam.

#Shadowrun

MEMO:

Just as a good workout should leave you pleasantly tired and maybe a little sore, a good day at work should leave you twitchy, irritable, and anxious.

#Shadowrun

MEMO:

Employees are reminded that hypernormalization is one of Saeder-Krupp’s core values.

#Shadowrun

MEMO:

I am not sure what Spinrad thinks he will accomplish with his latest political project, but I do want a report on my desk on how to subvert and bend his new party to the Company’s will by the end of the week. -L

#Shadowrun

MEMO:

Unfortunately, it appears that the security algorithm that can distinguish gunshots from fireworks can be overcome by…many, many fireworks.

#Shadowrun