A Tony at Law

Another one. 😤

Okay amigos, it’s that time of year again. I don’t have the same following here as I did on the bird app but if you’re a law student or know a law student drop an emoji or gif that describes how finals are making you feel. I’ll pick a few ppl at random and send a Starbucks GC your way. Good luck!

It was beautiful. The judge agreed with all of my arguments during closing. ☺️

We love a 2 word verdict! 🧑🏼‍⚖️

I could never have been Andy in Shawshank Redemption because my dumbass would have gone back to jail to visit my friends like “Hey guys remember me?”

Aww you guys are too nice ☺️

Okay hear me out: what if we brought polygamy back and just married every immigrant we could so they could get their citizenship? 😐 lol

Have you ever met someone who constantly praises you for how nice you are that of course you say thank you but in the back of your mind you’re like “Jesus, who were you hanging out with before you met me?”?

Got a 2 word verdict today. Hell yeah. 😎

I could never do it. Because I talk coherently lol

Sorry if I talk too much. I’m just a grown up who never got over the “Hey look at this cool rock I found” phase 🙃

Got my first pedicure today and I gotta say, girlies, why were you keeping this a secret from us? This shit is fantastic. 🙃

I heard a piece of advice that I think every lawyer should share: a fish who keeps its mouth shut doesn’t get caught. 🤐

Got my signed bookplate for buying @davidpakman.bsky.social ‘s book “The Echo Chamber” (out now) but I bought the audio book so I have nowhere to put it. Unless… 🤔 @briantylercohen.bsky.social lol

Imagine going back 100 years and telling ppl that in the future pretty much everyone has infinite knowledge at their fingertips and ppl saying “Wow ppl in the future must be pretty smart” and you have to say to them “Nah actually it’s the opposite.” 😐

If I were a squirrel every day when I left for work I’d say “I’m gonna go out on a limb here” and my squirrel wife would laugh and laugh cuz she just gets me like that. 🐿️

Any kid in my neighborhood who had a trampoline I considered to be rich. Also, you can donate to the Scholastic Book Fair to provide funds for kids who don’t have $ to buy books: bookfairs.scholastic.com/content/fair...

Wtf is happening with housing? I went to look at an apt yesterday. Leasing agent is going over expenses. Then she tells me part of it is $340. Not for a deposit. Not for services. They want $340 JUST TO APPLY FOR THE LEASE. 😐 I walked out. I’m not giving you $340 just to apply. GFY.

Box Elder judge accused of child sex crimes A sitting justice court judge in Box Elder County was arrested Thursday after police said they uncovered evidence he committed child sex crimes.

ksltv.com/crime-public...

One of the court clerks reached out today because they had to reschedule some of my hearings next week. I said sure, and didn’t ask why. Well, apparently it’s because the judge got arrested. Happy Friday! 🙃

You know how ppl with underbites will get their jaw broken so they can get surgery to correct it? Basically Trump is breaking the country’s jaw so he can try and fix it. The problem is he doesn’t know how. So we’re just stuck with a broken jaw for 4 years. But hey, at least we got plastic straws.

Against my better judgment I went back and looked at Biden’s SOTUs and speeches to Congress over his 4 year’s in office He never mentioned Trump’s name once. Trump mentioned Biden 13 times last night. Trump is such a pathetic and petty man.

a man sitting in front of a computer with pmitf.com on the bottom right ALT: a man sitting in front of a computer with pmitf.com on the bottom right

Fact checkers watching this speech:

Omg I’ve never been more embarrassed to be an American as I am now. 🤦🏻‍♂️

I want a partial refund on my law school tuition because a lot of what I learned in Con Law is just out the window.

One aspect of being a lawyer I didn’t realize would be a thing is how sometimes walking into court feels like being a regular at a bar. You see other attorneys and greet each other like old friends. The judge knows your name and welcomes your arrival. It’s not exactly the same, but I really like it.

Streaming? Do I get CLE credit? 😅

I’m on my 6th tiktok account. Why? Because tiktok flags my comments and gives me strikes. You wanna see the comments that get these strikes? They’re so fucking tame it’s infuriating. And conservatives bitch about how they’re the ones being censored:

All of this. People are often afraid to speak English because a-holes mock them for their grammar. Then those same a-holes will turn around and yell at them to speak English. Like, they tried and you made fun of them for it. What else do you want from them?

My Johnny Tsunami era (is that a thing?)