Finally met my match, he was right there all along. Off we go to happily ever after

Plane had an unexpected water landing, good thing I took the limo this time! (Still have not received my baggage 😠)

Dave’s limo service, 5 stars
I don’t know where we’re going, but we’re arriving in style!
For the glory, the penguins, and the CO2 emissions!

Most of the wedding party has gone missing. More importantly they still haven’t found our baggage! I’m about to write a very harsh yelp review.

What could go wrong indeed. Crash landed, no snow, does not look like brochure. Polar bear escaped, I hope they’re careful with him! He’s a rental!
#destinationwedding
#arctictoantarctica

I hope we didn’t mix up the bear tranqs with the MANFLUENCERS “special blend”, because DJ Hot Mic is passed out, and the bear is looking extra ripped 🤷‍♀️

UPDATE: ONE PENGUIN ESCAPED. IT’S IN THE COCKPIT. PILOTS ARE SCREAMING. 🐧✈️ #AirborneAnarchy

Granny is ready to celebrate my big day! Can’t wait for her to meet the penguins!

Final boarding call! Polar Bear sedated, the penguins are ‘secure’… what could go wrong? 🛫 #BridalPanic #arctictoantarctica

Safe travels! I prefer private jet

Been up all night working on my wedding playlist with the MANFLUENCER, aka DJ Hot Mic 🔥 🎤
he has the best song ideas!

Oooh sounds like a great place for a honeymoon!

Manfluencer is so smart! Don’t forget to sun your space ports before Saturday! (I will be able to tell)

You are such a good friend! Teach him to bulk up like you did! All natural baby.

They’re both passionate about the 9 ancestral tenants?

I can tell you one thing, they both love raw salmon snacks and are hard to train!

Oh good! Hopefully they use the space to add a Fourier to first class, a curtain is not enough!
I’ll be flying in style with plenty of leg room on FLYtLESS airlines, see you Saturday!

I told the florist I was afraid the photographers wouldn’t get me in the best lighting, since travel to Antarctica is “not recommended this month” as it’s nearing 6 months of darkness, and she came up with the perfect solution! Selfie-light bridal bouquet 💐 💡

*I’m NOT really getting married, this is just a character for the kinetic grand championship

When your wedding planner says ‘go big or go home’… so we’re smuggling a polar bear from the Arctic to Antarctica. Meet our plus one thanks to Manfluencer, you may not know he’s a legendary fur trapper who’s swapped pelts for passports. Looks like the tranqs are kicking in 😆 ✈️ #ArcticToAntarctica

I guess Aunt Arctic’s was right…
Manfluencer said Penguin meat tastes like “a piece of beef, odiferous cod fish and a canvas-backed duck roasted together in a pot, with blood and cod-liver oil for sauce”, and he still has plenty of space in his exotic meat locker

All of my attendees get a free sample! Let’s all live our healthiest life, the way the manfluencer does, all natural!

#destinationwedding

The Manfluencer is letting me keep my ice purse in his exotic meat locker (I don’t trust the penguins), and has great suggestions for the food !
I swear I’m firing the next assistant who tells me penguins are a legally protected species 😡

www.trashlantis.com/adopt-a-peng...

My wedding planner came through! My regular followers know that I’m huge fan of The MANFLUENCER -the ultimate Alphacrunchy, for years!!!
He’s the cutting edge of fitness, diet, and stoic sleep patterns…and he's my Wedding DJ!!!
#destinationwedding

I am not happy with this itinerary from the flight crew, turns out I’ll have to leave Friday to get to Antarctica by Saturday! My friend only had to fly 4 hours to get to her wedding, seems unfair 😭

flightfree.org

Finance said it was a blood diamond, but I don’t see any red?

After millions as requests from my billions of fans and followers, here is the ring!
Unfortunately shortly after this photo shoot the ring disappearedi heard penguins like shiny rocks… #penguinproblems

www.trashlantis.com/adopt-a-peng...

These aren’t normal penguins, they are trained character actors, doesn’t that mean they’ve been trained to hold their breath?

Meet the wedding party: 10 Adélie penguins in mini tuxedos. Trainer says they’re ‘semi-trained’… they’ll be staying in my walk-in until Saturdays flight 🧊
#destinationwedding

www.trashlantis.com/adopt-a-peng...