sleepiest girl in the whole wide world

I’ll admit it’s kind of weird to have a pet who is hotter than you

Call me whatever you want but the subway is no place to show affection to an so!!! Like literally never !!!!!

A tarot reader in Woodstock told me I’m in a sacred marriage with my soul !!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Profound af!!!!!!!!!!!!

i just can’t get over ICE going into the streets of the city i live in, throwing gas at citizens, invading people who live here. this is state sponsored terrorism being enacted on americans

An evil neighborhood church left a flyer on my car

It’s like ughhh should I be a tortured genius or a happy loser

god tim gunn really has the perfect voice

I won’t let myself have a mental breakdown even though I think I deserve one

This city is being held together by bandaids and the only thing the @mta.info can give us are shiny new cars with less seats

@mta.info the whole idea of a well-functioning city is to have the trains working ALL the time not just m-f 9-5pm. The trains are never more packed than the weekends.. ppl need the trains on weekends too shocker! Waiting 20 min for a train on a Saturday is unacceptable

The @mta.info ruining another perfectly good night because the trains are a disaster so I’m left to take a $60 car home in so much traffic. Thanks a bunch, fam!

THREE!!!!!!! THREE CHILDRENS BOOKS!!!!!!!! OMG!!!!!!!!

I just learned kash patel wrote a children’s book about a king named Donald who is protected by a guy named kash lmaoooo what the actual fuck

At this point everyone knows you won’t find love on dating apps.. you have to go on a reality tv show

I don’t think we give enough credit to how hard owl city’s fireflies went

I hope expecting mothers continue taking Tylenol because we need someone to fly those airplanes!!!!

Why are they so afraid of autism. Is it the swag. Is it the autism swag

When my cat uses his litter box next to me peeing in the toilet it feels like we’re a couple but a couple in this sense

Dems could easily win back republicans if they pushed the Epstein file release but then they’d have to lock up bill clinton and they won’t do that :(

Stay tuned lol

love my buddy

You know you can just buy corn dogs and eat them whenever

The left will not destroy the right the right will destroy themselves

It’s a moment I encourage my haters to have. What do I care anyway, I’ll be dead!

reminder it’s your god-given right to be happy about anyone’s death

Wow I’m really watching the sun set at 6:40pm maybe this is the winter I kill myself

Idk guys the world is bumming me out idk how to be chill but like it’s important to protect your peace to a degree cuz just sitting here riddled with anxiety doesn’t help anyone idk idk man

The free speech activist who built a list of professors he worked to get fired for their speech must be celebrated for his support of free speech, and anyone who quotes his speech accurately in context will be fired and/or face state punishment by the champions of free speech, do I have that right?