Simon Pegg

This wasn’t a take on being in a war zone that I was expecting and yet…

That latter crank went straight into my DMs the moment he followed me there, and gushed in telling me how 'Shaun of the Dead' was one of his favourite films.

Cranks. Not doing research since the dawn of fucking time.

Way back when on the Hellsite, he used to follow me for a bit. I did not have a Scooby who he was, and he kept trying to interact with me over a few months.

I eventually realised he thought I was **that** one, and then when I followed up to correct, he blocked me immediately.

See also: Johann Hari

There is nobody on planet earth so terminally online in his Mum's basement than Ian Miles Cheong.

Also, nice reference, Robert.

“I have showed Mr Trump and Mr Netanyahu some of your hottest Bluesky posts.”

fuck, I’m sorry, I can’t compete with this

Americans are gonna die and then the president is going to look into a camera and call them stupid for not leaving

His future working for Evri is secured.

First week in the BBC graphics department and already thriving

2026 is apparently the 'Year of the Horse'

The Horse:

"... a second lunch has been obtained."

I've been unemployed for a few months. I now set myself pretend jobs to prevent the rot setting in. My son thinks this guy is funny, which is a good enough excuse to make something. Any requests?

So farewell then, Richard Osman,
On House of Games you were 'the man'.
On teatimes we'll no longer be shouting;
"Where the FUCK is Kazakhstan?"

22.00 FILM: FOR YOUR EYES ONLYFANTS Just £15 a month and you can watch me roger moore, while I show you my Octopussy, edge Christopher Walken off the Golden Gate Bridge, a take deep, deep interest in Christopher Lee's powerful weapon. Please note, for the Blofeld/Oddjob mash-up please speak to Sean.

Filth. Utter filth.

In Romesh's favour, they're not going to have to change the logo much.

*Amol Rajan blows the dust off his CV*

Fabricant has got strong 'Norman Bates wearing his mother's wig' vibes.

Nobody likes an "I told you so" ...

Terrible to see that Ronnie Barker has been dragged into this

Makes you wonder where men who don't wear socks with shoes will congregate now.

At least Ayatollah Khamenei didn't get to see Brewdog sold for just £33m.

what a shame for the founde... never mind

but at least the beer was... scratch that

the pubs had great atmos... nope not that one either

Neither does Toby.

That WW2 Italy truism still has relevance:

When the Germans flew over the British and Americans ducked. When the British flew over the Germans ducked. When the Americans flew over everybody ducked.

Dubai is very much the Milton Keynes of the Middle East

If I'm honest, I hope the only casualty is Dubai Chocolate.

I once referred to Dubai as 'LinkedIn with beheadings' on Twitter and got two days of men in ill-fitting jackets telling me I was British as if it were some kind of own.