don’t piss me off

call me pandora the way my box releases evil and insanity

and FUCK YOU FOR KEEPING MY URANIUM GLASS COLLECTION

shoutout lesbianism and drugs

you’re welcome to oomf’s neighbor who i made eye contact with as my shirt was coming off 🤩

it’s such a cutiepie little tiny airport i think i will sit at the bar with my journal and sip a drink mysteriously before i board

snoopy is wearing a helmet and scarf and sitting on a red box . Alt: snoopy is wearing a helmet and scarf and flying away on a red dog house

FLYING OUT OF THE SNOOPY AIRPORT TONIGHT

From anxious attachment to emotionally unavailable It's what we love to see

clocked

when you tell her to fuck off and she listens 😩‼️

catching ppl up on the last six months of my life is a Thrill

Police also reported that an "uninvolved bystander" saw the suspects enter the building and "drove the suspect's unattended vehicle into the front of the store."

reading about a robbery at a jewelry store in my hometown and this part is fuckin frying me

developing an online persona that regularly demands money despite being a person who gets scared when someone gives them money

u know im rly confused because its hours later and im still trying to make sense of it

what, do you see me as a person or something???? the fuck

when someone who isn’t actively trying to fuck me is kind to me ??????? u allowed to do that ????????

and i know it was quoting me because my mutuals were linked in the article. please, my ego

when i posted then deleted something about that dude getting necked and it still became an article HEADLINE

it’s so hard being this fucking hilarious

my hometown is so unreal what do you mean i was a cock in middle school and a condom in high school

i came into power the first time a man asked me to punch him thinking i was a weak bitch and i gave him a concussion. he bought me a cat for my next birthday

* **** ** *** ****** **** ** ** ***** ** ***** * ****** ****** *** ***** **

maybe it’s a manic episode but i have been Feeling Myself lately

THE DREAM ACTUALLY

i keep receiving redhead allegations which is cool but my natural hair is very much blonde and it throws me off every time

there is so much………… but i can’t cut it because i love being told i look like a mermaid/fairy

should be illegal for me to have to wash my own hair

just received the funniest text of my life. i can’t share it but just know it’s hilarious

i still can’t believe i somehow got lumped in with the impossibly hot ppl of bsky but i am deeply grateful for it every day of my life. obw

shocking!

i used to throw up multiple times a day and then that mysteriously stopped when i left my abusive ex wife

throwin up first thing in the morning

i did not miss this

seeing lots of new places lately