Matthew Highton

Day in the life of an Edinburgh Fringe performer

I honestly think all bikes should be chipped and every time they run a red light are automatically fined/debited. I'm so sick of nearly being ploughed down at a crossing by twats. Three missed fines and they're glued to a unicycle and forced to live like a shit Wheeler from Return to Oz.

Alex on twitter writes: "Someone on Twitter writes: "You’re a menswear writer. You don’t know anything about manufacturing in America, or steel mills, or metallurgy, or CNC machining, or how anything is produced from raw material into a finished product in this country or anywhere. Stick to writing about “men’s fashion."" I reply: "i actually had a career in knifemaking before this. the reason why you can't avoid tariffs in knifemaking is because everyone relies on Gobelin machinery. are you aware of this?" Alex replies: "Gobelin machinery? What exactly are you referring to?" I reply: "you Gobelin DEEZ NUTS!"

"stick to menswear"

If the Avengers had been fighting in Edinburgh whilst the Fringe was on.

Not one of them even considers take away. Ridiculous.

If the Avengers had been fighting in Edinburgh whilst the Fringe was on.

I did the first one, and it has changed me into a 40 year old.

Oh, and back into a comedy writer.

Highly recommended.

horrible accident at the recap factory. no one can tell us what happened

We etch nearer every single day.

I for one cannot wait for this new era of content.

a cartoon of spongebob standing in front of a window with his hands in the air ALT: a cartoon of spongebob standing in front of a window with his hands in the air

Things you learn when you become a parent: There's SO MUCH morning...

Five years ago today I recreated the Round the Twist intro using only stock footage. Enjoy again.

a tweet from Louisa Loveluck reading "Sky News reporter says journalists were told by Israeli officials that aid drops into Gaza could be cancelled if media onboard filmed the shattered enclave from above."

sure sounds a lot like "if you try to photograph evidence of our war crimes we will commit more war crimes"

This sounds delightful but I have no time 😩 🙏

I think Fantastic Four was everything I wanted Superman to be. Goofy, but character driven and focussed. The aesthetic was lush too.

Bit harsh.

When I was little, the U.S. military came to our home at gunpoint and took me and my family away. We were imprisoned for years in barbed wire camps simply because we were Japanese American. I have spent my life telling that story, hoping it would never be repeated.

Petition: Urgently fulfil humanitarian obligations to Gaza Act to ensure deliverer of fuel, food, aid, life saving services etc. We think this shouldn't be dependant/on condition of Israeli facilitation as the Knesset voted against UNWRA access to Gaza. We th...

If you’re in the UK here’s at least one petition you ca sign right now. petition.parliament.uk/petitions/70...

I try to just be silly online but what’s going on in Gaza is just gut wrenchingly heartbreaking and it might be a drop in the ocean but we need to speak up and dissent. Compassion is one of our greatest gifts and sometimes it seems so absent. Humanitarian aid and intervention is needed now!!

Great stuff. Congratulations!

R.I.P Brother

Just a regular normal size man on his way to watch an 18 film at the cinema.

Would watch an action film called Nanny State tbf.

Huel, I don’t think people should be eating t-shirts or shakers, free or not.

NO IT FUCKING ISNT ALL THE CREATIVES ARE FUCKING **BROKE**

👌

Beautiful

Someone’s a sucker for the 40s ♥️

Yeahhhhh that’s a good look

I’ve never even heard of this?