Chad Errio

It ain’t rocket science. Republicans don’t GAF about you. Never have & never will.

You know what my favorite Bible story is? The one where Jesus takes the loaves of bread & fish, keeps it all for himself, and tells the poor people to go fuck themselves and get a second job if they can’t pay the bills.

If you make $60K per year, then paying for someone else’s food stamps costs you about $36/yr. BUT, you pay about $700/yr in corporate subsidies.
POOR PEOPLE ARENT THE PROBLEM.

FOX News headline- “Liberal Antifa College Professor Attacks Federal Agent.”

Our new Signature Show premieres TONIGHT! I can not stress how excited I am for this show. Don’t miss it!

Went to the doctor today & got my flu shot.
Came home & took a couple Tylenol for my ankle.

Still terrible at math. Still not interested in trains. Weird.

For the Epsteinth time- Tylenol does not cause autism.

Okay the "text thread" from the Kirk shooter strained credulity enough but "anti-ICE" written in the casing by someone who shot only immigrants and no ICE agents is the proof they're faking evidence to blame the left.

For the Epsteinth time- Tylenol does not cause autism.

Good news everyone! Although Jesus DID come down from the heavens to rapture the Christians, he saw his shadow so we get 6 more years before the apocalypse.

In case any of you were wondering why no one has been raptured yet-

Tylenol cases autism. Try new Covfefe!
*side effects include brain worms & dementia

really hope Trump was right when he said Latinos were criminals & “bad hombres”.
Taco Tuesdays are gonna SUCK if they get raptured too.

Are we sure the Rapture is tomorrow EVERYWHERE?
My town doesn’t pick up the trash until Thursdays.

Wait a second… The Rapture is on a Tuesday?
What kind of asshole god would make you get up & go to work on Monday?

Hear me out- What if the brain worm was autistic?

I know I’m not going anywhere. I just want to see the look on the faces of all the people who THOUGHT they were good Christians, but didmt make the cut and have to stay here with me.

I really hope this Rapture thing is really happening tomorrow. But I need to know- Do they mean at exactly midnight or just whemever Jesus decides to swing by? Cuz it’s 11:20 as I write this and I want to be prepared when it happens.

I tried to find some humanity in all the chaos. And now I understand what actually matters the most.

Donald Trump is in the Epstein files, you fucking morons. Stop getting distracted.

The more I watch people fight about Charlie Kirk, the more I realize how much this division is costing us. We need to rise above the noise and reflect on what truly unites us. So I stepped back, did some soul searching, some real self-reflection, and

“It’s worth to have a cost of, unfortunately, some gun deaths every single year so that we can have the Second Amendment”
- Charlie Kirk (2023)

Nothing like a fancy Chicago wedding to remind my wife that she could’ve married up. ♥️

For now, the cabin is secure.

Maisy has since been seen strutting the dock, checking every bush for raccoon resurgence & accepting congratulatory belly rubs from the entire family. Bob could not be reached for comment, but a tipped-over cooler was found at the treeline, suggesting he may attempt a comeback next season.

BREAKING NEWS: Dachshund Declares Victory in Ongoing Raccoon Dispute
After a final midnight standoff by the fire pit, Bob the raccoon fled into the woods under cover of darkness.

The raccoon allegedly stole a half-eaten pizza next to a drunk, unconsciouse man, then paused to steal a beer from a cooler before vanishing into the trees.
Maisy has vowed to double her patrols and start sleeping with one eye open.

CABIN IN LOCKDOWN: Bob Outmaneuvers Security Dachshund… Again. Officials Question Fence Integrity & Moral Resolve.
Bob scaled the deck railing just befre dawn this morning, bypassing Maisy’s defensive barks and a strategically placed broom.

Maisy was seen circling the can and barking at empty beer cans.
Officials say the case remains open, much like the cooler Bob also allegedly got into.

INVESTIGATION CONTINUES!: Who Knocked Over the Trash Can?
Cabin Security Footage Inconclusive!
While Maisy claims Bob is behind Tuesday night’s garbage raid, Bob’s legal team (a squirrel and a confused frog) have denied all allegations.

Sources say Bob approached the deck “with extreme snack confidence,” while Maisy responded with “ferocious barking and low-to-the-ground lunges.”
Tensions remain high.