August J. Pollak

Buddy of mine said he was thinking about trying ozempic but he realized that if ozempic works by suppressing your hunger signals, then you could achieve the same thing just by ignoring them. He lost something like 50 pounds in the next few months after this enlightenment.

This is called having an eating disorder

The actions necessary to even remedy a fraction of what DOGE did will take a level of commitment and funding that rivals the Marshall Plan, and if you expect that to happen from a Congress that won’t even end the filibuster to give people healthcare, godspeed.

I keep pointing this out, but I don’t think people actually fathom the catastrophic loss of expertise that occurred from DOGE’s gutting of the federal government. Imagine if every school teacher in America with more than 20 years experience all vanished tomorrow. This is irreparable damage.

It will actually not be possible to accurately calculate the number of people who will die, directly or indirectly, because of the stuff DOGE did in a matter of months. And as such, not a single person will face any repercussions for it. This is one of the most total victories in American history.

Meanwhile, after the cute little 2-week news cycle of some meaningless public feud with the president, Elon Musk—and probably also Peter Thiel—walked away with their hands on what is likely a database of literally every single American citizen’s most private financial and demographic information.

DOGE was not a failure. Its purpose was to use the completely fabricated claim of “efficiency” to irreparably annihilate vast amounts of federal government infrastructure, which it did instantly, violently, and in ways we will not see the full repair of in our lifetimes.

I think a problem is there’s such a vast difference in the quality range. Brownies can be anywhere from 1–10 depending on the recipe, but even cinnamon rolls straight from the tube are like a 7 baseline.

After you help your boss convert a doc to PDF

The Distracted Boyfriend meme, but their heads are now: Guy - a wide-eyed cat Girlfriend - a cat tree Red dress woman - a Christmas tree

It's that time of year

I love hearing news the church that kicked me out for being lesbian is getting into controversies bc their pastors are either predators or committing adultery…
Meanwhile I design both Heaven and Hell now for the number 1 show on Prime 🥰 I wish them a horrible life ✌🏻

The entire New Deal is being drowned in a rusty bucket but Trump was nice to a Democrat for 90 minutes and the entire conservative media apparatus responds by asking if Trump is okay or is he like sick or something

It’s quite telling how the American right has basically achieved nearly everything in their wildest dreams through Trump’s presidencies but “the wheels are falling off” this unmitigated generational victory because he showed civility to an ideological opponent

Federal pension eligibility kicks in at five years of service, but she still can’t collect until she’s 62. She could really want the healthcare subsidy that comes with that pension, but that’s a hell of a long game.

A box of rambutan fruit- they are small, dark red fruits with tiny green splines all over them.

Sometimes I see a fruit I’ve never seen before and it’s incredibly adorable and I get emotional because I can’t actually adopt the fruit

Oh no I’m at the farmers market being overstimulated

Trump just gave a stronger endorsement of Zohran Mamdani than Chuck Schumer did.

Nuh-Uh Liberals have excused the Shutdown cave by saying the movement on Epstein and highlighting the GOP's cruelty will buttress them in the 2026 elections. So far we have a poll showing it will actually... help Susan Collins get reelected. Great job everyone.

This is of course one of the most glaring examples on how surrendering for a vote on ACA was peak Democrat stupidity. The vote will fail but Democrats generously provided Collins another out for that precious, precious Sensible Moderate™️ cred.

I get this is Liberals 101 but there’s no actual political benefit to arguing that an ineffective Democrat is better than an effective Republican simply because the former makes you feel better. You’re just doing Rule #2 again.

bsky.app/profile/augu...

The Press Secretary’s job is literally to spin and promote the president’s agenda and Leavitt being a horrible person with a horrible boss is completely irrelevant to the objective fact that she is better at that job than Jean-Pierre was.

I’ve made this point before but the biggest luxury item consumed by the median American voter is racism. It’s the thing they most enjoy when they have nothing else to care about and whenever the economy goes to shit it’s the first thing they let go of to tighten their budgets.

The hilarious irony is that probably the one major sector where Trump could dramatically reduce prices, would, of course, be healthcare, but he can’t/won’t because the increases are entirely his doing and fixing them is Democrats’ entire case to not vote for Republicans.

This is astonishingly bad news for Trump in that there is basically no way prices are going to lower now because even if he eliminated all of his tariffs (he won’t), companies will simply… Keep prices where they are now. This is gas post-Iraq war all over again.

Obviously, in a world where God was real and happiness was possible, WB would just be appropriately broken up into like six separate companies, but since that option doesn’t exist in this realm of reality Netflix getting it is a trillion times better than Paramount or Saudi Arabia

It is honestly horrifying that Netflix buying Warner Bros is at this point the least-worst option of all of the viable options currently on the table

Warning signs appear on Mexican beach declaring area restricted by U.S. as Mexico rejects Trump offer to strike cartels The signs read in English and Spanish, "Warning: Restricted Area," and had been declared restricted by "the commander."

Trump accidentally invaded Mexico.

www.cbsnews.com/news/warning...

ABI Bouhmaida @forgoodcode Every Windows 11 PC is now an Al PC with Copilot at the center of it all. Here's how to get rid of Copilot completely from your computer (1/3)

ABI Bouhmaida @forgoodcode 1/ Settings App > Personalization > Taskbar > Other System Tray Icons > Switch "Microsoft 365 Copilot App" Off This hides Copilot from your taskbar

(9) ABI Bouhmaida @forgoodcode 2/ Press Win + R > Type in ‘regedit’ > Navigate to "HKEY _CURRENT_USER\ Software \ Policie s\Microsoft\ Windows" > Right-click on the "Windows" Key > New > Key > Name the new key "WindowsCopilot’ > Right-click on the new key EY > DWORD (32-bit) Value

@forgoodcode 3/ > Name the value "TurnOffWindowsCopilot’ > Double-click the name of the value > Set the "Value Data" to 1 > Restart your computer Congrats! Copilot is now completely gone from your computer. Hope this helps

My new favorite kind of meme is "here are detailed instructions on how to turn off AI". 🔨

“I didn’t think the leopards would rip off MY face and use it as a mask”

Centrism Cannot Fail, It Can Only Be… Oh, wait, it’s totally failed.

Reactionary centrists generally act as if they are always the outsiders, always giving the Democratic party a path away from its failures. But in fact we do have examples of reactionary centrism in practice. And…it’s success rate is not impressive.

www.everythingishorrible.net/p/centrism-c...

I keep thinking about this because it just astounds me on a daily basis how many Democrats think "I can't believe you believed us" is a winning electoral strategy. These people truly care about nothing except feeling good about themselves