Ezwyn

A text of spicy nature

Part 2 of the text of spicy nature

I get spicy

Turned myself on when I spit my toothpaste in the sink.

Woke up feral
Time to be a menace

The Godfrey Audio Guide is my latest addition to my podcast obsessions.

a cartoon cat with a bow on its head is standing on a wooden floor with her hands on her hips . Alt: a cartoon cat with a bow on its head is standing on a wooden floor with her hands on her hips .

It’s time to dance! Join me!

Did I overwork my shoulder muscle by masturbating?

You already know the answer. It’s me.

On days when I don’t feel worth my own kindness, I ask myself who taught me to offer kindness only to those I deem worthy.

I get one life, and I have to spend it struggling because of some shitty fucks out there?

Bullshit

Shit

I finally feel well enough to sit up, so I’m using this new power to be gay in video games.

A Snoop Dogg CD works really well to scrape dog shit off of the sidewalk.

Follow me for more life hacks.

A person with long rainbow colored hair

I got my hair done. 🥰

An ant bit my ass in my own bed on the middle of winter. That’s some bullshit.

Executive dysfunction is getting stuck reading 400 pages of a book because every time you finish the 10 pages of a chapter, you tell yourself to get up and eat, but then you say “oh but it’s only 10 pages one more” because you’re not ready to do the task.

Not even a 104 degree fever stopped me from being horny.

Cereal

I forgot to update: 35 orgasms in the new year!

We’re up to 25 orgasms in the new year! Wooooo!

A tattoo done on the inner upper arm of a Lovers tarot card depicting Morticia and Gomez Addams. Gomez is kissing up Morticia’s arm, and the scene is framed below by a skull and two roses.

Y’all, I’m so fucking happy

Good morning!!!

It’s tattoo day! 🥰🥰

I painted my nails, and my attitude doubled.

Hornyyyyyyyy

Onion rings in a box. The rings are inside each other, fused at the top. The effect is of a stylized vagina.

Iykyk

Puppets from the 90s from a kid’s show called Timmy the Tooth. On the left is Timmy the Tooth, a giant tooth with arms, a bow tie, and giant blue eyes. On the right, in Timmy’s arm, is a toothbrush with the bristles forming dog ears at the top.

I was just brushing my teeth and had the most aggressive recollection of this fucker. I feel like I’m having a fever dream.

I slept impossibly deeply and woke up with a singular thought: they should make bbq scented deodorant.

A hand holds a realistic-style dildo to show off black nail polish on ballerina cut nails. The index and middle nails are cut short and have silver glitter applied.

This is how you take nail pics, right?

I love days when I get to flex more of my kink repertoire. 😈

A quote from the novel The Wreck of the Mary Deare by Hammond Innes. It says “Mike tumbled into the cockpit, hardening in the main sheet for me, as I headed south on a broad reach.”

Good gods. 🤣🤣🤣

The cover of the novel The Wreck of the Mary Deare by Hammond Innes. Depicts a man at a helm, steering.

Currently Reading: The Wreck of the Mary Deare by Hammond Innes

Did I make up a song about my microwave noodles?

Of course I did.

Were most of the lyrics just “noodle”?

I am not accepting criticism at this time.