Liza Jane

I don’t think I’m ever going to emotionally recover from shouting “Don’t eat Jesus!” while talking to a priest as my toddler son shoved a choking hazard Jesus toy in his mouth from a well-meaning parishioner at last night’s fish fry.

TIL that even though my husband and I grew up in different parts of the state, thanks to public school we’ve both seen STOMP more times than Casablanca.

Why is every tech ceo the villain from the Lorax

I can't compete with this.

watching Disney's "The Rescuers," set in an adorably childish fantasy universe in which the United Nations actually does something.

Kafka understood that an even greater indignity than being turned into a giant insect was still being required to go to work afterward.

Suprematism, by Nikolai Suetin, 1920-21, 📸 by @tiltoncreative

Honestly we should have all known we were in a dangerous global decline as soon as Hollywood struggled to make a new movie about Blade

Given that time frame, guess it’s time someone wrote The Bible 2.

I used to make ads during the era of fun ad making and it was always a sign of a bad ad if you saw a celebrity in it because that meant the creative team couldn't write a good spot and the only hope of selling it was a familiar face. How many ads had celebrities in them tonight?

They moved an entire farm and a power station onto the field in five minutes and the Pats can't move a football 10 yards

Someone is going to write a dissertation about this half time show and I will read it.

Bunroe Doctrine

A publisher who lays off a reporter whose pen is freezing because she's covering a frigid war zone while dodging missiles is not an editor you want to work for, in a more perfect world

I will admit these photos do make it seem like I kicked the baby offstage

Tennessee Republican bill would limit federal office to natural-born citizens • Tennessee Lookout Tennessee Rep. Johnny Garrett is trying to disqualify some U.S. citizens from a shot at running for federal office.

At least two Supreme Court cases, cited in this story, have made clear naturalized citizens and those born to citizens abroad -- think, those born members of the military stationed outside the U.S. -- have the right to run for federal office.

poor kafka, forced to churn out new books from his extradimensional prison

One of my priors is that things are really bad if I am coming across news related to the bond market.

Really wish my husband and I could just be normal every time we hear “What’s in the box?” on the Ms. Rachel tonie.

lemon it's january 3rd

There it is. The final print edition, after more than 150 years, of the Atlanta Journal Constitution

elink75f.mail.breakermedia.com/ss/c/u001.o7...

They're making cars too curvy now. Everything looks like a dang oval. Do not explain the reasons to me please. I need cars to look like this

a man is walking down a hallway carrying a green bag ALT: a man is walking down a hallway carrying a green bag

It only took us three attempts over two days to get all six adults in the same room while the one-year-old is awake to finish opening all of the presents.

And to Tiny Tim, who did NOT die, and will return in Avengers: Doomsday

Long overdue

Currently at the funeral for the penny, happening at the Lincoln Memorial:

Want to add that traffic advisories from the police should probably be issued more than a day in advance and issued somewhere other than Facebook. I only even found out what was going on thanks to a local news article. Would have been nice if that article was published more than 2 hours in advance.

Private Equity Finds a New Source of Profit: Volunteer Fire Departments

After taking over housing and healthcare, private equity is now buying up software used by volunteer fire departments — making it even harder for rural communities to respond to emergencies.

The only winners from private equity's price-gouging spree are wealthy investors.