abhuman

ykno i don't need life to be perfect but i would well and truly settle for just like. less disorders. Like ykno life is going ot be what it is, maybe some are inevitable, but I don't need this many.

Well I'm convinced, no notes.

"heroes and hawaii five-o" oh that is d o o m e d doomed.

armor so hard to get off of, might as well enjoy the time out of it right Nem?

trying to force people to turn the sound on and watch/listen to it in full mainly. it's really popular with slop voiceover-mill stuff because people would learn not to deal with the mangled drawn out audio and just read it if they were curious enough

theres a lot wrong with the uma musume trainee system and all its rng, but i will admit, something greatly appeals to me about being able have Mihono Bourbon teach her unique super technique to her gf Rice Shower and watch her activate it in the clutch as she closes out a race.

goading retribution

gotta say realizing i could talk about major mental health stuff by just deleting a word has made so many things easier. people have so many more questions and opinions when you have to delay/avoid something for mh reasons than when you just say "health problem"

there's something so abyssally grim about the surge in fascist attempts to control information and communication globally and how hand in hand it is with corporate demands for all of our data and control over our lives, knowledge, and intake

i understand the value and necessity of "hey promote yourself it isn't annoying" advice, because it is broadly true, but i really wish humans were better at nuance, bc "do so within reason" and "some people will always find it annoying anyway" are in fact also important to know and deal with.

super creek especially, i will forever take psychic damage from offhandedly mentioning Super Creek being my favorite uma alongside Rice Shower and only realizing afterwards that i was in sufficiently mixed company that people would think i meant fanon soulless sauceless version of Super Creek.

like idk, when i was completely unaware, only just beginning to figure out i was a woman who liked women, discovering lesbian fiction with real joy, not too long after i had to learn the hard way how shitty and precious people were about this, and i think thats lame as fuck, esp that its ongoing.

like i have just long since learned, oh, that phrase doesn't mean anything, people will apply it to het harems and m/f/m where some of the women think about kissing each other sometimes, but people are so desperate to make it a mark of valour and force every newer reader to learn the hard way

its so absurd how sapphic has become both utterly useless as a term and permanent discourse because the very people making the phrase useless feel insecure about it and wanted to be treated as brave leftist hero's for including vaguely textual sapphism alongside infinite heterosexuality

Special dark cocoa powder plus black food coloring to finish it off is the best way to go unless it's a food where squid ink is a more appropriate choice. The cocoa gets it most of the way there and the dye rounds out the color.

Unless a doctor told you to do it, probably just skip eating charcoal.

hitting those old school angst vibes and listening to a horse with no name. mood tbh

i do not understand the big publishing obsession with full priced ebooks, especially for novellas. like if i pay full price for an ebook and then discover somewhere down in the extra product details section its novella length im never buying from em again lol. and that's not even a hypothetical

Autumn is here

Digital painting of Carmilla fingering Laura. Both are characters from a 1800s book titled Carmilla. Laura, a short blonde woman, has all her limbs streched and held at the corners of her bed by creepy shadow creatures. She wears a shreded chemise, revealing her breasts. Carmilla, a black haired vampire lady with unaturally gray skin , is on top of Laura, fingering her with her left hand. Carmilla wears a loose white chemise. The scene is dark and only Laura can be seen clearly.

Carmilla & Laura

probably says a lot about me psychologically that some of my favorite shirts are part button-ups with a firm collar when the top button is buttoned just for how they feel around my neck

the problem is right as i was realizing, but before i realized, i got involved in a really neat romance plot, and heavily committed to it with the other player, and now im kinda stuck. worse im not sure i even can write the requisite flirt/love at first sight scene im stuck on at all.

like ive got this character, lovely lass, very sweet, social specialized with a bunch of neat tools, but i realized over the course of playing her i just really don't want to deal with social forward play, i want to play some weird/horrible creatures where im way more comfortable.

haven't been on here in a bit, driven here by ttrpg frustrations i can't talk about elsewhere, which. ok so what if the sunk cost is like, really sunk, and majorly cost, and i really don't want to cut my losses. surely i can overcome this through willpower with no consequences right.

wow thats the barrel scraper stuff. that genre can get so nasty lol. a lot of it is at least just like. i don't want to engage with social implications, so people just have/don't have [conditionally] which is honestly preferable. the places cis ppl go when they try and elaborate are, well, that.

once at the very end of a strong, undefeated super creek run i had a gold ship lock in and win through all of my alarm clocks for the day. horse is truly built different.

the funniest thing about uma musume is that at any point gold ship may simply Appear and Get You and you have no control over this. lore accurate.

yet more cyberyuri grist for the cyberyuri mill

i feel like informational control and business media malevolence have done so unfathomably much damage to the world. like so much of the shit business ghouls and politicians actually say would inspire the most eventempered to mob them with pitchforks, but ppl only get the whitewashed version.

sitting here waiting to start a ttrpg scene filled with overwhelming anxiety and imposter syndrome, terrified of fucking up or doing things wrong and everything will suck, and i just have to keep choosing to do it anyway and waiting. it lets me do more things but man it doesn't make it much easier