🛎️

fortuitous and pituitary are beautiful twin sisters

do they have the chocolate calculator tho

only way I can save money is by convincing myself one day there will be the adult book fair ,and thjs time.. Ill b prepared

whyd u burgle my buns bro where my sammy gonna sit now

: D

$25 to whoever can sound the least professional replying 2 thjs broad

even moreso every time

Im the first person with shaken adult syndrome

I gotta get a concussion again to post good

when you change your profile picture you change the shape of your soul

hey gurl are u a cadbury egg bcause i want to lick u until i have a seizure

oohhggggh you get me

wait

I wish we could adjust the nozzle head for our pissing I wanna do mist

wanna drop it at the doorstep nd see betty making her street famous pie ,and say special delivery !

I wanna b a man jn the way. the neighborhood milkman is a man

Im takin it as the latter nd running with it like a finish line ribbon cryin nd squirting my water bottle all over myself

Im like a autistic male bird that looks big and stupid doing my little routine just 2 impress you while losing sight of all else

IM CALLING OUT OF WORK

MAMA IM SORRY. THE RED 40 IS TALKIN TO ME SWEET TONITE

the red 40 addiction., FUCK

LMAOOO I WAS TALKING ABOUT TAKIS fuhvjkk I could slaughter som of those rn hnnfng

um twistin her vine till Im red and- Idfk anymore. what does thjs mean

to my coworkwer: I’m not having a good day today Id appreciate space ( every single day)

fuck a squatty potty I need a shotty potty where it blows my brains out before a shirt removing experience

fighting my incel instincts like the venom symbiote

of course ! literally the best craft ever all tutorials just stab and pray ,and it works

FELLOW FELTER OMG THESE ARE SO CUUTEEEE

Ill take care of this. dont worry

in the morning theyll lie & say its 8am when it is actually 7 am