ʏᴀᴛᴏ.

"Look up. It's- 𝙎𝙐𝙋𝙀𝙍𝙈𝘼𝙉!"

a pixel art drawing of a cat and a sign that says casino ALT: a pixel art drawing of a cat and a sign that says casino

𝓢𝓲𝓷𝓰𝓲𝓷𝓰, 𝓭𝓪𝓷𝓬𝓲𝓷𝓰, 𝓴𝓲𝓬𝓴𝓲𝓷𝓰 𝔂𝓸𝓾𝓻 𝓻𝓮𝓪𝓻 𝓮𝓷𝓭: 𝓘 𝓱𝓪𝓿𝓮 𝓪𝓵𝓵 𝓽𝓱𝓮 𝓽𝓻𝓪𝓲𝓽𝓼 𝓸𝓯 𝓪 𝓼𝓾𝓹𝓮𝓻𝓼𝓽𝓪𝓻!

Would you rather... Hire me to grant you a wish, or eat one thousand raw clams?

ᴀᴅᴜʟᴛ/ᴄʜᴀᴍᴘɪᴏɴ ʟᴇᴠᴇʟ ʜᴏʟʏ ʙᴇᴀꜱᴛ ᴅɪɢɪᴍᴏɴ

❤️&🔁?

You got any whiskey?

[Burping.]

"To think you even broke your own window for me... I mean, the dedication is admirable, but man-! Talk about a letdown!"

Munching on the chocolate bar and dropping the wrapper on the ground, jumping on top of her table and reaching for the hidden cookie jar.

"Slick? All this belongs to me!"

[PINNED] [FOUND YOU] [FOUND YOU]

kas

night 🤙

[Catches it with a grin, his eyes lighting up.]

Haha!

Your wish has been heard loud and clear!

[Gripping it tightly.]

Those enemies of yours aren't gonna lay a finger on any of your friends!

[Holding out his hand.]

Urgh... now I have to explain too?

I think I'm just gonna have a drink instead...

[Collapsing onto the ground.]

"So what I'm saying is, you smell like an angel- and if you're an angel, you should know I only grant wishes for HUMANS!" he yelled, taking a bite out of the chocolate bar, stuffing another one into his pocket.

"How dare you trick me! I'm the God of FORTUNE, not the God of Stupidity, y'know!"

You got a nickel?

[Eating another sky hamburger, wow- is that one medium rare?]

I don't even have a Regalia, how am I supposed to fend off the Ayakashi?

No Regalia, no Shrine, no money?

I'm as good as dead!

Look- I joke about a lot of things, but a wish I'd NEVER joke about.

Wishes are hopes and dreams born of desperation. Sometimes, a fleeting, comforting thought. Sometimes, elaborate and planned.

Some people think wishes are hopeless, but to me - a wish is a promise.

Only a devoted worshipper can make a shrine. It's the ultimate symbol of devotion. Gah.

Who am I kidding?

I'm a hopeless, good for nothing God...

[Taking a bite out of a hamburger without asking.]

Yato began to pick up his mess, hoisting all the signs between his arms and legs.

"You've got Far Shore written all over you! And to think you're in a CHURCH of all places," he said, rather pathetically.

"That Jesus, he's got all the worshippers a guy could ask for!"

Stealing a chocolate bar.

Make me a-?

GAH. I don't need your pity shrine!

Are you trying to make fun of me or something?

So that's what that funky smell is. Here I thought it was an Ayakashi coming to ruin all the fun.

You smell like the Far Shore, friend. Is that why you can see me?

ONLY IF I'M THE ONE GETTING CREDIT!!!

How am I supposed to be the most popular most amazing and richest handsomest God now?

😭😭😭😭😭

I don't even have a shrine...

a bunch of red roses are surrounded by black leaves and stars ALT: a bunch of red roses are surrounded by black leaves and stars

[ 𝘿𝘼𝙃𝙇𝙄𝘼, 𝙏𝙃𝙀 𝙉𝘼𝙏𝙐𝙍𝙀 𝙎𝙋𝙄𝙍𝙄𝙏. ]

ꜰᴏʀ ᴇᴠᴇʀʏ ʟᴏꜱᴛ ꜱᴏᴜʟ, ᴛʜᴇ ʙᴏɴᴇꜱ ᴏꜰ ᴀ ᴍɪʀᴀᴄʟᴇ.

- NO LEWD!
- 18+ writer
- Crack / Banter / Serious

ʜᴏᴡ ᴅɪᴅ ɪ ɢᴇᴛ ꜱᴏ ʙʟɪɴᴅ, ᴀɴᴅ ꜱᴏ ᴄʏɴɪᴄᴀʟ?

WHOA.

HEY!!! 💢💢💢

I'M SUPPOSED TO BE THE ONE MAKING IT RAIN BURGERS!

STOP STEALING MY WORSHIPERS!!

..........

( makes it rain hamburgers )

[ 𝙁𝙖𝙮𝙚, 𝙋𝙧𝙞𝙢𝙤𝙧𝙙𝙞𝙖𝙡 𝙤𝙛 𝙈𝙖𝙜𝙞𝙘 ]

- NO LEWD!
- 18+ writer
- Crack / Banter / Serious

​🇸​​🇹​​🇴​​🇵​ ​🇲​​🇪​, ​🇨​​🇴​​🇳​​🇹​​🇦​​🇮​​🇳​ ​🇲​​🇪​, ​🇩​​🇴​​🇳​❜​🇹​ ​🇱​​🇪​​🇹​ ​🇲​​🇪​ ​🇱​​🇴​​🇴​​🇸​​🇪​

IT'S LIKE RAIN BUT YOU CAN EAT IT!!!