Lorapora

When there's a big loud noise I try to act blasé so my dog doesn't go nuts, but she's recently started barking at me if anyone calls my name or knocks on the door and I think she thinks I might be deaf.

It's now stuck to the shelf.

This is, unfortunately, a common occurrence with my memory. Thankfully not with my adhd meds, but usually with cocodamol. I end up going without because I can't remember if I took them in the first place, and as we know, cocodamol does very little for cramps.

Was about to swallow my painkillers but realised it was a tad squishy and I'd only gone and put a 70mg of Elvanse in my gob! At 7:15pm!

He's mixing up Price and Worth

"OK, this is the last one, I promise. How about this time we move the little stones from the outside and put them on the inside!? I know it'll work, I feel it in my bones"

What if the central alter stone of Stonehenge found its way there naturally and the whole purpose of Stonehenge is them trying to work out how to transport it back because they were bored

Screenshot of my previous post which says "period cramps be crampin'" and underneath, a picture of Ripley from Aliens looking at her tummy has been labelled "adult content"

I beg your finest fucking pardon?

Ripley in one of the many Alien(s) films. She's on a bed, dressed in a white nightie which is pulled up over her belly. She looks down in horror (because I think a baby alien pops out her tummy) while arms from unknown people (midwives?) hold her down. Honestly, it's pretty gruesome.

Period cramps be crampin'

Saw a tiktok about the Stonehenge alter stone being from Scotland and the mystery of how they moved it 500 miles, or so (if it was moved deliberately) and someone from the States commented

"I mean 1000km is a decent distance but not that big compared to things in the USA."

Sooo yeah.

Going to Iolo Morganwg a rumour we also invented the ice cream cone. It was us.

Going to Iolo Morganwg a rumour that Welsh witches cut the pointy bits off their hats to avoid witch hunts and subsequently created the national costume

A black dog with a white patch on her front sits between an old sofa and a coffee table. Around her neck are my headphones. She stole them and somehow managed to get them around her neck. She understands the errors of her ways. My left ear is really soggy.

She stole my headphones earlier because I needed to focus on work and now she's in a patronising supergroup

In the 80's, banana clips were the final boss of impulsive urges.

Why shouldn't I try putting my head in this small, mysterious, plastic bear trap?

Just seen some tiktoks saying banana clips are back in style! I do like a swishy ponytail but it could also look a bit Thunderdomesque on me

Skittle knickers = when you're a know-it-all, but you have adhd

The Return To Oz girl as a grown up in film The Waterboy, stading at a window and holding a sign written on cardboard that reads WANT ME TO KILL THEM?

Coffee is the King, tea is the Queen, orange squash is the Jack, water is the Ace

Me saying "Remember when I gave up coffee t'other day?" But I have coffee breath

Her lips are devilled eggs and her skin's the colour of mocha

Add chicken stock and make it taste fowl

If the thought of a big fat juicy spider swimming into your mouth makes you uneasy, don't put a star anise pod in your tea and promptly forget about it

Fair play, he almost coined the term YOLO. It's why he was so hellbent on making up as much shit as possible in a short space of time. He now haunts microwaves.

Hahahaha yes!!!

Belly button in Welsh is botwm bol 🫡

"My friends call me 'The Sphinx' but my real name is Sphincter"

It's a shame the belly button isn't a sphincter because it would be really useful for holding things like tea towels

The kids are into cassettes? The.kids.are.into.cassettes!

[Alt. A small cheap cassette recorder that's decorated in gweni stickers and stuff, plays an ELO tape. It sounds a bit warped. A dog barks and presents a ball but is ignored due to her unsanctioned sass]

Cup sizes being A, B, C, D, DD, E, FF, etc is proof that all boobs speak Welsh.

Is tomorrow extra sleep day?

Dennis Nedry at his computer desk in Jurassic Park. He's looking smug because he's a tech guy (obvs), and he knows something we don't know. But he did do that little "ah ah ah. You didn't say the magic word" animation, so gotta give him credit for his creativity. Fair do's.

I thought a green tea with the smaller caffeine content would help appease the cold turkey gods, but my brain's like