tmread

The prophets tell us that two more Mickeys remain: Mickey Core and Mickey Crust. Only when they have come will baseball be complete.

How disappointed I was when I found it The Eagles were actually just five dudes. Not a single one of those fuckers sleep in a cage with a cover on it.

The speculation cycle around Forest firing Nuno is not fast enough. I want the discussion to move to the possible-next-team hype era.

The beauty of Sparta’s album Porcelain is that I listen to it infrequently, and as a result I forget how ridiculously good the back half of the album is. Start at “Death in the Family” and let it run from there. Volume way up.

The Octonauts Cinematic Universe

The lesson here: yes, you can buy yachts and rockets and media properties. But it even a few minutes of free ideation and you’re figuring out the logistics of adding another mound to Cahokia, made entirely of mashed potatoes.

And I think — as a joke, just for comedy — I’d first hire a small army of people and have them place and complete the Zeitpyramide sculpture. And then after complaints, I’d move it away but then remove one block every ten years a couple weeks before the next one is placed at the real site.

I would build a fully realized version of the Sandia report’s nuclear waste storage, but all messaging would be appropriately licensed transcriptions of Longmont Potion Castle calls.

I would pay to have every bus and train in LA wrapped with graphics that weren’t sized according to aspect ratio so it looks like you’re driving alongside the only Lamborghini Countach that could comfortably fit Lurch from the Addams Family.

I would fund all — ALL doctors offices in California to have the cardboard treasure chest with plastic trinkets that you can grab after your visit. You just went to the dermatologist and got that thing checked out! Good job, here’s an orange plastic ring that looks like a spider.

I would buy one of my old apartment buildings and flood the first floor with sausage gravy just because it wouldn’t be financially ruinous and no one’s ever done that before.

If I were a billionaire, instead of buying newspapers and media outlets, I would privatize Olympic Blvd and make it the world’s longest Slip-n-Slide. And fund research into lowering friction to near zero. Downtown to the ocean in 45 seconds for just a nickel.

Ultras, but for kids AYSO teams.

As an LAFC fan watching every other game and then watching us not score in two games.

You asked ChatGPT and it told you? Well, I was casting bones and they told a very different story.

Watching LAFC vs Chelsea prematch coverage while trying to work, all I can think of is having prematch analysis for the workday.

Lighting a candle for you.

Basically all I am thinking about these last few days

1. LAFC vs América was life-giving
2. Who will we get in this extended transfer window?
3. Will they be selling jerseys with the CWC patch and bold numbers?
4. I should get back to work. No, wait, that’s boring. So on the topic of transfers….

I’d never heard of Earthsea or LeGuin until we saw the first book on a “stories to read to your kid” website. Hoooooooooly smokes. We inhaled everything Earthsea and years later it still haunts me. Absolute mastery.

Legendary dodgers manager Dave Roberts is wearing a jacket and a hat. He has a serious look in his eye, like he wants to congratulate me for my amazing rec league coaching record.

My rec league coaching record extends to 3-0. I’m not saying I’m the best but my record is pretty good.

Everyone talks about Tom from MySpace checking out and not bothering anyone but the coolest dude to walk away from it all at the peak is Bat Boy. Captivated a nation, got his payout and lives his life quietly. Doesn’t even post on the socials or have a podcast. Awesome work.

I went to a pizzeria, I ordered a slice of pizza, the fucker gave me the smallest slice possible. If the pizza was a pie chart for what people would do if they found a million dollars, the fucker gave me the "donate it to charity" slice. I would like to exchange this for the "keep it!”

Immaculate vibes at Dignity Health for #ElTráfico tonight. #VamosLAFC

A US high school style desk with a blue plastic chair and a small attached writing surface.

Job orientation in 2026 starting with “and here’s your workstation - well, most days - we hot desk as well.”

Chicago Pope means that sainthood for Harry Caray is in play. You cannot tell me there aren’t a few verifiable miracles caught on tape among the many hours of broadcasting.

Early reports from the College of Cardinals indicated that Yadier Molina is heavily favored currently to be the next pope, owing to his proficiency at catching runners stealing. Unofficially, there remains a belief that this gap under Francis kept the Holy See out of the postseason.

Liga MX es el mejor.

(I feel like I should appreciate Serie A and I just can’t gin up the interest.)

So the Cardinals will elect a pope and I haven’t heard peep about Ozzie Smith. Did you forget the 13 gold gloves? Whiteyball will help a stale papacy reliant on the long ball and you can’t say you won’t lose your shit when the pope does a backflip on Easter. Watch highlight reels before objecting.

Kings about to choke, Galaxy and LAFC underperforming, ACFC wobbly. Dodgers have no choice to get back in the saddle — at least they’re back on top of the west.
And there’s also the Clausura Liguilla. Maybe we get another absolute barn burner of a half like the América vs Cruz Azul 2nd leg.

Every time I see this guy’s chicken and his cooking I am reminded there is still good in the world. Looks so amazing.