hai guys! i'm in desperate need of money for medications for my C-PTSD. i've opened art commissions and only take paypal as payment. dm me if there's any interest and i'll haggle a price :') mostly just doing sketches/flat colors. i need $40 for a month supply ..
smoked a fat one happy birthday to mee
making pngtuber stuff for streaming :3
umm improvement :3 one on the right idk when was made
trauma is a bitch but we win these
sketch 😴
chibi jason :3
Ducks walking on Hydrangea petals.
i've been infected w the homestuck virus
toyhou.se/30676224.sat...
iz ur head supoosd 2 feel liek it's bein stabbed w needles oor iz tat abnormal
horny system postin (it's jst suggestive art stuf LOLZ)
i've been havin nonstop flashbacks 4 liek 4 days nowe how iz evry1 </3 i also started vraylar last night i hope this bullshit actually helps lmfaoo
also 'm Not an edbsky acc anymoar 'm recoverin on m own but i still support my mooties ofc ilya n i hope u all find happiness eventually 🫶🫶🫶 /gen
crying in the void
system shit <3
who cheered
i farted
ok well i am signing off of edbsky till i get my shit together, i am recovering snd i need to stay in recovery this time, because this will be the death of me kf i don't. i love food and i deserve to eat what iw ant, wen i want. i'm punishing myself for nothing
i genuinely, don't know why he thought leaving any nuance here was ok. i've been through so much trauma, sometimes my C-PTSD flashbacks feel "unfixable". so what the fuck AM I?
i don't know how to bring this up because addressing the topic itself feels like i would suddenly be deemed "unfixable". why would he even give any nuance to not hurting me at all?? why is it a question of whether i am fixable or not? i'm scared. i don't know what to do. (6/6)
i don't know how to feel safe anymore because the sentiment of "i wouldn't hurt you unless we couldn't fix things" is fucking terrifying. i couldn't fix my bio parents' relationships and they've been at each others' throats, threatening to kill each other and me. (5/6)
because what's the threshold for being "unfixable"? are my abusive behaviors unfixable? is me cheating unfixable (which i would NEVER so, having been cheated on myself. just an example)? (4/6)
"i wouldn't murder you unless something between us was unfixable." i've been stuck on this sentence for so fucking long. and he has said multiple times that when we get married, he would never divorce me, even if we lost feelings. so i'm so fucking, distraught? (3/6)
(a while ago him and i talked about my trauma, and i mentioned that a lot of the times my paranoia gets the better of me due to trauma, and i think he would kill me if i ever slipped up even slightly. he tried to comfort me by saying the following, (2/6)
need some advice about approaching my fiancé about.. something. tw very heavy violence mentions. (1/6)
I think the least we can do is nourish it and let it thrive how it is. We just cannot find any balance, and being plural makes it so much harder because of our massive amnesia barriers. We love ourselves for each other, but we don't love ourself as an individual. (3/3)
.. But does anyone have experience with outpatient ED recovery? I just want to love myself again. I shouldn't hate my body outside of dysphoria, snd even then I shouldn't punish it for not being my "idealized" form. I'm literally a system, we will never collectively be happy with our body. (2/3)
Does anyone have advice for bringing up your ED with a healthcare professional..? I really regret letting this disorder take over my life, I feel like i'm slowly dying everyday of my life. I want to recover so bad, and I am tired of relapsing. I'm not UW so I think i can heal with outpatient.. (1/3)
i feel like eating disorders should be classified as munchausen syndrome. i'm making myself so much fucking sicker than i should, just without the attention-seeking behavior. but this has to be SOME form of munchausen..
YEAH EXACTLY?? literally the easiest platform 2 massblock a community u have such a hate boner over. but noo u gotta brag abt bullyin nd deplatformin mentally ill minors who feel misplaced in society??? i think the sad case is u bub
ok 'm gona recovr ii feel mself gettinf physical rlyy bad nd 'm p ssure m ed haas made me develop POTS...
