👻 Michael Boo-radt 👻

I miss when our politicians weren't trying out the worst open mic material I've ever seen or heard.

Take me with you, hat.

They had about 1 trillion good choices for a title for the Springsteen biopic, and they somehow fucked it up.

You would think they'd at least spell check "bar."

Fuck off, Disney. Doing the right thing only when it affects your bottom line might as well be doing the wrong thing.

Fuck off.

ILLINOIS — Trump’s Gestapo violently throws female congressional candidate @KatAbughazaleh to the ground to the ground

I mean, Borderlands 4 JUST came out...

If you're not concerned that two late-night hosts have lost their jobs because this country elected the softest, most rabbit-eared piece of shit who's ever lived, freedom of speech may not be for you.

I don't normally notice this, but I absolutely hate how my hands smell.

My god, Bears.

Soldier Field sounds like it's absolutely shaking.

"Through the roof," would be a decent pun if he had a shred of intelligence.

If there wasn't enough proof that Trump is a stupid fucking moron, he declares war on Chicago on a weekend that the Bears have a Monday night game, so no one has anything better to do today than to protest.

Dr Pepper Soda GIF ALT: Dr Pepper Soda GIF

Doctor I trust more than RFK Jr.

Has the TACO seen The Untouchables? Not a good idea to fuck with Chicago.

They all think they're comedians, and not one of them is funny.

None of these fucks have any comedic sense or timing.

Bullies usually only bully until they take that first haymaker on the chin. LFG, Chicago!

These are all absolutely insane statements, but that bottom one, HOLY SHIT. He should be in solitary confinement for life.

It's crooked. How perfectly on-brand for the administration.

And we're supposed to believe that he started using "lo and behold" and didn't spell it "low and behold"? Please.

ICE Slashes Training Days to MAGA’s Favorite Number to Suck Up to Trump Training courses have reportedly been slashed from five months to just eight weeks.

Unfortunately, in the extra time that was cut, they were supposed to learn courage, compassion, and the Constitution.

ICE Slashes Training Days to MAGA’s Favorite Number to Suck Up to Trump share.google/Df6jKlUvMNbk...

Is it fucking time to talk about gun control yet?

Good point. We can't afford them, anyway.

I just got charged a $2 "handling fee" on a digital download. Who wants to check my blood pressure?

Am I just uninformed, or is it fucking weird that he always has a cadre of sycophants standing behind him in the Oval Office. It looks like they're waiting for grandpa to deliver his last words.

Done.

SO STOP WATCHING THEM AND BOTHERING THE REST OF THE FANS, YOU FEEB. I haven't watched them regularly since the Maddon/Ross fiasco, yet I'm not hellbent on ruining everyone else's good time because of it.

I honestly think you'd rather see them lose so you can be insufferable. Even in my HJE days when that was my schtick, I wanted them to win.