Michael sisto

Bahahahahaha

Replacing Gregory Bovino with Tom Homan is like shitting your pants and changing your shirt.

If someone put a gun to my head and forced me to watch “Melania” I still wouldn’t. I’d rather die

The placebo on the gazebo was in Sausalito

Why can’t things ever spiral into control?

I remember 2025 like it was yesterday

Martin Landau and Walter Mathou can’t hold a candle to dalton greencow

Rodrigo manifested that entire thing because he had never tasted so much water before playing the drums in front of the fireplace with the golf stick.

Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Friday, April Thursday, and all of the July’s were there. Where were you?

Don’t expect to eat something fancy when flying. All they serve is plane food.

I don’t wanna go to sleep. Because the next thing that will happen is tomorrow, and I’m not ready for that.

He couldn’t remember the pill’s name, but it was on the tip of the tongue.

A friend of mine tried to annoy me with bird puns, but I soon realized that toucan play at that game.

I havnt urinated in a week..i suspect that’s why ive got a severe blinding pain in my side, but im not sure

I learned about the upcoming mobile home movie by watching the trailer.

The detective found the missing train by following the tracks.

The food vendors negotiated a lower price at the stadium, but they had to make some concessions.

A punctuation mark made a mess in the toilet. It must’ve been a colon.

To earn a college degree in eating, students need a lot of courses.

During the trial, the demagnetized piece of iron was cleared of all charges.

If your cow doesn't produce milk, is it a milk dud?

I couldn’t quite remember how to throw a boomerang, but eventually it came back to me.

Arachnophobia is so wrong. Just let spiders get married.

I missed my mini Hindustani stringed instrument practice because I couldn’t find a baby sitar.

if olive oil is made from olives, then what is baby oil made from?

Sometimes you just cant unpoop something

The cheese spent a lot of time at the gym hoping to get shredded.

If you disagree with your tailor, he’ll tell you to suit yourself.