Fitz!

This is actually quite brilliant, up to and including the final sentence 🔥

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We're celebrating our birthday with a MASSIVE GIVEAWAY - you could win our ENTIRE RANGE of cool and sexy toys!

TO ENTER:
❤️ LIKE ➕ FOLLOW
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This post only!

ENDS on the 29th January 2026, at 4pm GMT.
Winner will be announced & contacted by this account only.

I'm also telling people to only spend on AMEX/Discover cards since those are both closed-loop networks, and so far as I know neither have been involved. Outrage is one thing, hitting revenue will force them to act. In an extreme scenario, if enough people switched there could be shareholder lawsuits

I think a lot of people find it hard to answer the phone is because phones are always on silent, turning an incoming call into a low, monotone rumble. It's ominous and threatening. We need to bring back fun ringtones. Retvrn to a mono-track MIDI of a Black Eyes Peas song

This is exactly why I almost compulsively keep my webcam pointed at the ceiling but on while waiting for people to join, so it doesn't look like I deliberately had my camera off but am still not in frame

Don't forget you need the Xbox AND the PlayStation

If I ever get a pet leech I'm naming it Mark Suckerberg

This is what happens when you fumble your ultra quirky goth gf then surround yourself with incel yesmen for 4 years I guess

The Cybertruck being such a disaster is the perfect symbol of Elons decline. Only a few years ago he was the one likeable billionaire, and his companies were legend. Tesla singlehandedly proved EVs could work. Now you can't wash them. SpaceX invented reusable rockets. Starlink barely works.

There's a minimum threshold where if you're below it per serving you can say 0 calories. Splenda is notorious for this, where they claim it's 0 calories, but a cup of Splenda is actually 96. Less than sugar to be sure, but far from 0. (Also the carcinogen risk)

Second suspiciously furry looking contractor truck I've seen in the last few days, at this rate I feel like I'm gonna start seeing ads for roofers on e621

Lmao I literally drove behind that van for half my drive to work this morning and to their credit they're now my favorite HVAC company

Finally able to move out of my parents after COVID with my bf and not have to "act normal" 24/7, pumped to spend every weekend just being a dumb dog and hanging out with him and friends

I've always said conservativism is by definition the ideology of the lazy. When your entire philosophy is "keep everything the same/the way it was in 1970" it's clear you literally don't care about anyone but yourself, and can't be bothered to be slightly inconvenienced to allow others to exist

I predict familiarity with AI tools will become like typing, where it was at one point a pretty rare skill with a lot of value that now is just a baseline skill everyone has. The difference being that typing used to require expensive equipment and practice, but chatgpt only needs a Chromebook.

POV: You are a zoning commissioner who denied the request of a welding shop owner

Babe what's wrong? You haven't showered with your shambluey.

Not quite as fast as I hoped but we're still down 5 pounds in 2024! Mayhaps if I keep this up I'll feel good enough to post pictures of myself on the Internet to make strangers horny, that's the dream

Hypnosis/mind control

Tips for moving from Xitter to Bluesky Before you start following people, fill out your profile! Bio, PFP, banner, and post at least 5 to 10 things. Just reuse your top 10 banger tweets—recycling is encouraged! This way, when people see you followed them and they check your profile, they’ll know what you are about and might follow back. Turn off NSFW filters in Moderation > Content Filtering Find your friends using a tool like skeet.labnotes.org or Sky Follower Bridge. Not perfect, but they’ll find the majority of the people you were following. Turn on “show posts from my feeds” in Settings > Home Feed Preferences. This will add random posts from them to your main feed, but tweaked to your liking, no ads and BS. I recommend the Catch Up feed (kinda like a “best of”). Tweak Reply Filters to something that works for you, also at Settings > Home Feed Preferences. This shows replies from people you follow to anyone else on your main feed. (ran out of characters! OCR will work though)

Did some other site's owner try to monetize the Holocaust and you finally GTFO? Are you feeling a bit lost in this new website? Here are some tips for you. Share widely for all the newcomers.

As someone with asthma I really hate that I feel this so hard. I literally cannot be in the same room as someone smoking for more than a few minutes but it's just a really hot aesthetic

But why would you want more pay when you could have

1. Ping pong table (no ball though)
2. Cold brew on tap (usually empty, mediocre when full)
3. Work life balance (no overtime because it's expensive)
4. No union dues (we promise they're not worth it)

This post made by business major gang

Not there any probably won't be able to go to any cons for a few years unfortunately, but for future reference how does one even get onto a party floor/room? Do you have to be invited? Know someone personally? Am I overthinking?

You or I will never begin to approach their level of intellect. Operating on a whole different level.

To see the shutout live I'll bet it was

I also always take some comfort in knowing my Subaru probably won't get broken into when I park in a lot 90% full of Teslas, Porsches, Bentley's, and now apparently Rolls Royces. Which is basically just chipotle in Bellevue. Pretty sure I'm not gonna be the ideal candidate for a ransom.