dazer

Just had an epiphany, I can be incredibly selfish at times.

Two women in my life are mad at me. I don’t know where I went wrong, the week started off pretty good too

Hitting on my 20 something year old coworker just for the hell of it. They’re absolutely eating everything up. You mean to tell me it was THAT easy the whole time??? I wasted years worth of affairs

I'm going through a different era in my life — I can tell because my go-to playlist is trash. Like, who’s in charge around here? Fire them Immediately

Despite not having any interactions on this app, I know I’m hilarious because my comments get over +5K likes on TikTok and IG. Also I have 2 community guidelines strikes against my acct.

I’m making a difference ✨

I still check up on my Twitter crush, even after we stopped talking 😔

I can eat a hearty breakfast then sit idle on my couch for a few hours and my body starts telling me “time to refuel, go to the pantry and open those bag of chips. Do it now, do it quickly”

Used my favorite beard conditioner when I first met her. Now, every time I catch that scent, it reminds me of her—and I can’t decide if I love or hate that

My beautiful tall ass friend at work comes over to my desk to just talk. She towers over me and I sit there all wide eyed, staring up and her and all that goes through my mind is “yes mommy, anything you say 🙂”

I don’t know how many stock market crashes I have left in me

I have to hyper fixate on someone at all times or I will DIE

This just dawned on me, but I’m a professional email sender. Cool.

My girlfriend doesn’t realize she has taken all of my future dating profile pics. They’re simply too good not to use

Also, we’re sharing an office with HR

I hate to say it, because I’m truly giving Bluesky a chance, but it’s all mostly co-worker humor

I spent a few hours at the museum today. Tbh I feel like most ppl there were posers. They weren’t true museum enjoyers like myself

The male urge to tinker

If only there were a way to adjust my algorithm so that my discover page would show a mix of whimsical posts and, well, huge tits. That would be swell

Holding onto as much suffering as possible because it’s the only thing that feels truly mine

The best thing to come out of this Deepseek news is hoping gigantic data centers stop becoming a thing in rural America

They say eventually you’ll find your tribe, your people. Uh why don’t they magically know I’m here right now when I’ve not told a soul. Do I have to use telepathy again 🙄

Thinking I’ll finally delete that other acct on that other platform. I’ll have at least 2 years worth of material to recycle

The nice thing about this place is that it truly feels like the void. But I know once I get comfortable and confess something deep it’ll go viral

I went to donate blood and when the nurse was looking for a vein on my forearm she audibly said “oh wow, that’s a good one” then lightly ran her finger over it. Not gonna lie but I blushed a little

The worst anguish I put myself through was falling in love with a mentally ill girl. I really thought I could make a difference

After the latest Instagram update, I’ve realized that my friends like some really stupid shit. Love to see it

One hard truth I learned is if a girl doesn’t fw you, you’d know within a week or two. No amount of time will change that. Now I immediately mentally check out and tbh that shit is so freeing

To save money, I’ve stopped buying trash bags because I literally end up throwing them away

I want to move into a bigger place to give all my plants the life they deserve

I’ve decided to become more unhinged online