Ben the Merman

Having to stay home under blankets and watch movies all day? Don’t threaten me with a good time.

Receiving nudes or pics from friends unprompted is my favorite love language

a picture of stitch with the words stupid head on the bottom ALT: a picture of stitch with the words stupid head on the bottom

My attitude to everyone at work today 🙄

Straight to jail

Calibri

I’m wearing some new, sexy undies today and feeling unstoppable.

Bake my cake?

The solution than is to have more sex

Using the pottery studio bathroom mirror to admire one of the best haircuts I’ve gotten in a while

a stuffed penguin with a pink hat on is sitting on a toilet . ALT: a stuffed penguin with a pink hat on is sitting on a toilet .

I WILL be complaining about how cold it is all day

This is a “I’ll believe it when I see it situation”

Any butts in particular?

I slept in til 9 this morning and it was glorious

Exactly! Which is ideal vs the backseat of a Honda civic.

Being specific with the car make and year really helps paint the picture 😋

Duh

I need a blowjob and a nap 🫩

Taste!

With a price point of $650….
If anyone is interested in buying hole pics drop me a dm.

I do 👉🏼👈🏼

You’ve got it 👀

My Saturday:
-Morning spin class
-Everything shower
-Plate full of dumplings for lunch
-Jurassic park movie marathon

LOVE Kristen so much

🥵🤤

being even more gay in 2026 out of spite

Everyone who voted for Trump… your mom’s a hoe.

🙂‍↕️

👀

I love that tumblr is getting a little renaissance lol