Jellyjam

Also see: accidentally turning my phone flashlight on and blinding myself

Accidentally opening my phone on selfie mode and recoiling in horror

He assigned you to the barn but never told you what to do, you’ve swept the floor for twelve seasons straight now. Farm animals wander the village freely. Your wife has had a baby. His name is WLODIJAJRMIR… you think?

You’ve lived in the village three years now. The man who invited you has felled the forest within a 20 mile radius now. He is constantly drunk on cherry wine. He runs in and out of the river to bathe and you’ve seen him down handfuls of poisonous mushrooms with no effect. He is your god.

You get to the village, you have no house, food or water. You stand shivering with five other villagers as the man who invited you builds three stone houses overnight in front of your eyes. He selects a woman for you and hands you 400 salted fish. You are happy.

Playing Medieval Dynasty, imagine you’re a peasant sitting by the fire when a filthy half naked man comes up and invites you to his village. You begin walking there and see him on the way, punching six wolves to death. He has also felled twenty trees in this time. You know then you will never leave.

Stardew Valley is definitely a fav, idek how many hours I’ve put into that, Sims 4, Sun Haven

Any game where I can live a peaceful little farming life really

post one of your favourite animated movies from the 90s 🎥 💜

“There’s more fish in the sea”

Not when I’m done there won’t be

If I’m talking in an elevator it’s to cover my squeaky farts

Oh wow… you REALLY shouldn’t have

I can’t remember the last time I bought a full price game, there’s so many in my backlog I’m happy to wait until new games go on sale for a reasonable price

There’s a war in my tummy and both sides are losing

a woman with a zombie makeup on her face is waving at a man in a room . ALT: a woman with a zombie makeup on her face is waving at a man in a room .

Hi

Cozy video games are my safe space ❤️

a video game character is dancing in a room with his arms in the air . ALT: a video game character is dancing in a room with his arms in the air .

I love basically all those!

Hi I enjoy touching cats to grass

Hi I collect books

And sometimes read them too

a kitten laying on a bed with its eyes closed ALT: a kitten laying on a bed with its eyes closed

I’m so tired today I can’t

On the minus side I got distracted with Lawn Mower Simulator, the most mind numbing game I somehow enjoy

On the plus side I went back to Ghostwire Tokyo which I dropped last year before finishing

How’s Psychonauts 2 treating you? It’s on my backlog too

I saved $15 shipping by spending another $30!

Wait hang on

Watching the world burn is just too profitable

I can’t wait to be devastated again

Cheaper than people AND they keep your secrets

This movie and Dawn Of The Dead have me thinking Zac Snyder has a secret obsession with zombie babies

Delicious In Dungeon gave me an appetite for cryptids 🤤

Oh my gourd I’m so intrigued!

What’s the gourd’s secret?

I had Songs of the South growing up and… it has not aged well

Um I don’t like the food you’re eating please only eat what I would eat (white bread and mayo with water for dipping)

Hitting the enemy and not seeing anything come off their health bar 😟