SonarPup

just a normal dog

[Solid Snake voice] Hnngg... Colonel. I've made a tactical fucky-wucky.

a chart titled "the mood meter" with the X axis spanning unpleasant to pleasant and the Y axis spanning low energy to high energy.

the more I look at it, the more I'm just like "yeah"

you'd think 28 years would be long enough to learn to not bite my lip while i'm eating, and yet...

ow :'(

talking to Cuno after hit hard too. the way he's basically certain/decided this is how he'll be, how he'll cope, exist a while longer, and eventually go out. cunoesse even showing some regret or grief at him expressing it.

I know I'm coming to the game late but... fuck.

damn, i RLY wasn't expecting Disco Elysium's depiction of amphetamine use to make me feel it in my chest like that. It's been months since I did any but WOW could I immediately feel the heart flutter, my body going "hey wtf??"

ayy i feel like a person* again sorta! cool! actually getting stuff done a bit

*still a dog tho

I don't really see as much benefit to removing the fn key row tbh. I don't care that much about the vertical space it takes up cuz that isn't gonna limit my mouse space rly. that said I also use them by accident about as much as intentionally so...

neat to see what other ppl value & why

because of the missing fn keys/nav cluster? that's always been the main thing keeping me tethered to larger layouts. I use a 96 as a result bc I do like having the numpad.

idk maybe my head's just in a weird spot currently? It's been better than in awhile lately tho. I have issues w choice paralysis so maybe this is that extended.

It sucks that like, I feel like too much is going on but also I'm barely doing anything and this is stuff I *want* to dig into.

swear it feels like weirdly soulkilly that there's so many things I like, feel a desire to be up on/know abt/understand (not in a research context but an awareness one) - like, there's too much of it to keep in my head at any given time, and it feels overwhelming in that way

give me a weed cart + a good '90s jungle mix and i will create the next sistine chapel except they're all furry babes

huh, didn't realize u were also in supply chain stuff - im technically not anymore but was, and tbh basically still sorta am.

feel like i shouldn't feel vaguely blushy after spidey tells a bad guy "you take a punch really well!"

i swear getting that complement a couple weeks ago from a friend either fixed or broke something in my brain

anyone else go thru like, a while of just consuming content *about* media rather than participating in the media itself? It feels weird to me and I think rly fucked up my ability to engage w primary media for a while. Finally playing games & watching movies & actually paying consistent attention.

just feels funny when i've like, never interacted w the social aspects of it at all

been kinda amused watching bandcamp give me notifs that ppl are following me. i don't make anything i haven't i think ever posted a review on bandcamp but ppl i guess look at music in my library and go "yea they have good taste" and yk what? i'll take that.

spiderman 2 does NOT have a reversible cover like the last 2 games did :(

I mean it does in the sense nobody can stop you, but it doesn't seem designed w that intent. Kinda a shame cuz it also has "Launch Edition" plastered across the cover.

if you can't handle me at my worst then you're probably a normal, well adjusted person

tbh love when im like "damn ive gotten nothing done today" n then end up talking to my manager and she's like "you and these other 2 are amazing, like, team players, i cant think of a bad thing to say"

ive been a lil anxious wrt work bc of struggling to get stuff taken care of but legit this helps

does mean ive been like "ok maybe im being too talky" again but im just doing it anyway lol, and abt things i actually like/have interest in again. if someone says somethin i'll chill a lil obv but im finally actually kinda caring less abt it.

like earlier this year i was obsessively in my own head, and recently I like, barely feel conscious of that stuff going on. not that i dont think abt it but more like, it flows thru instead of collecting.

kinda funny thinking abt the like, arc the way my brain works takes sometimes. like i feel like how i thought 12 months ago is diff from 6 months ago is diff from last month is diff from today not just in content but like, actual process. sometimes i talk to myself constantly, others I barely speak.

me: yea idk caffeine doesn't rly affect me that much i feel like
also me: bouncing my leg constantly, unable to sit still at my desk for even a minute, readjusting posture relentlessly

i had a single cup of coffee and didnt even make it right

Char Aznable wreathed in lightning with it coming out of his eyes too like that "kill yourself meme" but instead the text says "blame this on the misfortune of your birth"

Pics that go hard

lyrics screenshot from the song "passenger" by awakebutstillinbed, reading: i want to be alone for the first time i can remember ever since i was a kid i've filled the holes in my heart with other people "you're better off this way they'll all realize they hate you some day" i'm sick of hearing my own name and i'm tired of chasing things i can't ever attain i want to be alone

yea ok new awakebutstillinbed album v much has my number in spots

(don't explicitly wanna be alone but for once not actively feeling loneliness as the crushing weight it used to be, after a period of a LOT of disconnection)

lyric screenshot reading: i know i'm a crazy waste of space to society but i don't want that to be what you think about me i say that i don't care but i wish you were proud of me i've worked so hard to change this much will it ever be enough? cause i told my past to a woman on an airplane and it felt like a whole different world cause i couldn't connect to the person i was describing as if i, long ago, wasn't me

new awakebutstillinbed album is out!
lyrics continue to be full of vibes

a collage of despondent anime women

how your email finds me

Peripeteia is neat.

I like Kasia AKA "Hallway Weirdo". Kinda disappointed I couldn't take care of her mouse problem with an anti-tank rifle (she asked about a firearm, I figured what better firearm?)