Cody

Who among us has not Acted Up While Ovulating, ya know?

Every time a man pays me to tell him he's not allowed to jerk off, an angel gets it's wings

I've been single less than a month and it turns out I am an "eats ass on the second date" kind of girl. And my idea of a date is pretty loose

I'm like St Augustine "Lord, make me not a Dumb Slut...But Not Yet"

Every. Hole

I'm having the best rebound ever actually

Make Alex Release The Cheeto Pics

Learning Adult Communication, Being Rewarded With Dick

MY NAME ISN'T EVEN ON HIS LMAO I AM COOKED

I deserved both lectures I let that man hit it raw

Not sure what's worse at my big age, getting a safe sex lecture from my friends or getting a "don't be a dumb bitch while rebounding" lecture from them

Begging for dick is fine actually I don't even care anymore, I am letting the ocean wash over me and cleanse me of feeling bad about anything

I used to have dignity and now I am texting a man three times a day casually reminding him he could put a fresh load in me any time he wants

I literally can't remember the last time I was this horny, divorce sex broke my brain. I'm never gonna be normal again

No time to film lol

"So what's being divorced like?"
"I'm literally so horny I can't think straight today."
so there's that

Getting divorced makes Country music so phenomenally good it's kinda all worth it

I been getting around a little bit

My ex husband would be soooo mad if he knew what I was getting up to

You spend a few years wearing an actual collar and then when it comes off you get to run around like a feral dog

Sometimes your husband has like, a midlife crisis and leaves and you cope by fucking your year long celebrity crush

Being divorced is cool, I've been getting little presents and fucking men in their 40s

what do you wear on a date to a bath house

Doing Divorce Stuff and it's so tedious and boring and I hate every second of it, omg

So like what if I get divorced and move across the country and get my own bank account for the first time ever

warm up to start the day off with portrait of oomf @codydarkstalker.bsky.social

Every time you update I hope it's more dinosaurs

Before you go go

Finally watched The Goonies and it sucks???