whoretellini 🇪🇬

"No matter how corrupt, greedy, and heartless our government, our corporations, our media, and our religious & charitable institutions may become, the music will still be wonderful. If I should ever die, God forbid, let this be my epitaph: The only proof he needed for the existence of God was music."

RIP Kurt Vonnegut. Gone 18 yrs. Dang.

wiwiwiwiwwi congrats baby 🥹🩷🩷🩷🩷

I miss football season 🥺

when people deactivate where do their words go? do they just start saying weird stuff to people at the grocery store or what?

*looking around*

well at least all this anxiety is for a reason

THEM: why can’t you stop being depressed

ME: why can’t you stop being a dumb motherfucker

Anger management? Fuck that. Embrace the fury. You're a monster now.

Someone let me know when Venus Rx is over bc I am so close to shaving off my hair for a fresh start

I just had a chicken teriyaki stick so good I reverted to factory settings and said Alhamdulillah

And if no one’s got me, Asad’s Hot Chicken has got me

Accidentally scratched my tattoo 💔💔

bonus round find one that isn’t insane and remembers they don’t live alone

our holes do a lot. what i mean is, we do a lot of things via our holes

[Sarah McLachlan voice]

for just $2/day you can help feed the pack of rabid dogs we'll release on Kristi Noem

The whiplash from Broad St/Eagles footage and the rest of everything else going on is…a lot

About to be stuck in horrendous traffic GO BIRDS 🤪

The Civil Rights Act of 1964 was rolled back with an executive order and I'm supposed to keep working today lol

In committed relationships to my block button and a Honda Civic

went to the dermatologist today and was told they take my insurance on mondays, but not tuesdays. I am going to become the luigi

I wasn’t anticipating another 4 year headache but I’ve got a feeling this one’s gonna last way longer :/

Performing my civic duty by booing and giving a fat old thumbs down to not one, but two cybertrucks today

Heard someone say phone season like wym it’s always pho season. It’s always soup season for that matter

i cannot smoke my drugs because of my delicate dickensian child’s lungs, i need mine blended into a badass little sugary fruit square

I am begging for famous people to stop telling us this shit

Good morning here’s my cat?

Finally made an account on this godforsaken app