zoe

Twitter timeline doing its Twitter timeline thing

Five inches of snow!!!

PROPAGANDA

Youre the only one I trust send me these

This is how I found out Jimmy Carter died 😂😭

Me doing my email job everyday instead of playing flute :/

Another B L O C K

Well then get my straight jacket ready!! Since I started pouring milk first, I’ve never wasted milk AND my cereal stays crispy. I went to the dark side and I’m here to stay!!

Oh. This is NOT about red lights 😭😭😭

The opposite. I won’t wait for someone running a red and I’ll speed toward them when my light is green like I’m gonna T-bone them. I’ve scared folks doing this, too. They’d wanted to be Tokyo Drift so they’d better MOVE!

Sittin on my brand new couch not doing a damn thing

Booooo 🍅🍅🍅🍅🍅🍅🍅🍅🍅🍅🍅🍅🍅🍅🍅🍅🍅🍅🍅🍅🍅🍅🍅

I gotta balance today out with a lot of good energy now

Im sorry but that picture would make me report you too 😭😂

It took over an HOUR after being directed to numbers that were not correct, but finally someone understood the problem. Jesus Christ guys

@ultabeautyofficial.bsky.social your customer service is awful. I called now four different numbers and no one is helping me.

Not someone buying a $200 gift card on my credit card!! MARILYN when I find you! parkercollier@mail.com when I find you!!!! i hope when you try to use that card and ulta flags it, you get arrested!!

Today was one of my coworkers birthday. Bro tell me why these folks at my job put them on a PIP today. like I wouldn’t be surprised if that girl didn’t show up tomorrow bc wtf

Noooooooo you can't say it's good that an evil person got killed in a way that makes countless other evil people worldwide real fuckin nervous all at once in a way that u can physically feel in the zeitgeist around you, that tickles the soul and delights the senses, what are you, some kind of ghoul

Went to the Texas Renaissance Festival today!!! I shot nothing but duds lol

I’m replacing my 8 year old dell laptop with a gaming laptop and it arrives this week!! First thing I’m doing is downloading steam and EA

Where’s waldo(s)?

Mexican President Claps Back at Trump Over Tariffs Mexican President Claudia Sheinbaum threatened to implement retaliatory tariffs should Trump implement his proposed economic measures against Mexico.

“Seventy percent of the illegal weapons seized from criminals in Mexico come from your country. We do not produce these weapons, nor do we consume synthetic drugs. Tragically, it is in our country that lives are lost to the violence resulting from meeting the drug demand in yours”

Honestly like

Why is EVERYONE using “crash out” so much? Is this the new version of “I’m gonna kill myself?” Like something that’s objectively serious being turned into a joke?

10 hours straight on my feet! hosting is not for the weak!

I love when Megan thee stallion brings out the blonde hair!!!!!

Nope don’t do it!!! Trust your gut

Megan thee stallions eyes LITERALLY sparkle