Ganondorf in Bio

Your pathetic 30 second orgasm is more important then the mental and physical health of someone else? For the rest of their lives?

Grab a rope and find a wobbly stool. No one will miss you. Time will forget you.

Show your coworkers that 12yo anime kid you're lusting over. Show your boss that (if you have a job, lol). Show your parents and grandparents that.

"I've shown my [enter someone who should know better here] this and they're fine with it"

Congrats, they're all degenerate pedos, too.

Grown men will claim trans people want to molest kids, and then vehemently defend blatant pedophilic media.

"ACKSHULLY 🤓 she's not 10, she's a 1000yo vampire"

With the body and face of a 10yo? Uh....okay...

Yet to meet a trans person who even wants to see a child in their vicinity. Interesting!

Oo thank you, peace be to you! Is there a coffee or creamer? A napkin? Nice to see ya! Remember Jiana (with an "i") from high school? She's in jail now. Sad. Aw.

Me when I stacked the chairs after a religious service, to be helpful.

As it burns, I'll holler "Le epic meme! Awesomesauce, trolled! Video game reference! Woke bad!".

I've also heard something about a Roman Firepit - it's when you take a certain flag and set it on fire. I'm allowed to do it without consequence because I'm on the spectrum and I don't know any better and I was overstiumulated. It just *looks* like I did something "bad". You can't get mad at me. 🥰

"Roman salute"? Cool! Have you heard of "Roman Dentistry"? It's when someone removes your teeth (all 3 of them) without anesthesia, via a foot. They used to do it all the time in Rome. You can't be offended and it's not political bc it totally happened all the time in Rome, where we are now.

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Do whatever you need to do.

That's wild! Tell children you know this story (with a kitten-happy ending). They'll love it.

Go on

I KNOW HIM

Sometimes 2 souls just need to gaze at each other. And that happened. Love this!

Since I have a bunch of new followers: what's the weirdest thing that's ever happened to you? Rude/unexplainable/spooky/nasty😏/etc?

Call me Coast to Coast AM because I'll belive you.

That's correct. I imagine she's going "WOO!". In my amazing imagination.

The one with the cute guys

Hello new followers! I used to do this.

RUEFUL I WAS THAT DAY. I thought "Soft pretzels with, perchance, a cheese dippin'?!"

And capitalism said "Nay"

I know you're both more gorgeous without the smoothing filters. Fuck filters. Neither of you need them.

They were out of curly fries.

Yes this is she.

Happy Extremely Loud Phone Noise Day! Don't forget to leave out milk andEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

Well for starters I go onto r/eyeblech a lot. Gotta see it online before I see it IRL, ya know? Next you download a thing called The Onion Router, an-[USER BANNED]

No one wants that, Tony Boner.

Tell your harem to start rowin' bc I've got fish to catch!

"Not weird enough to sit with the weird kids, not cool enough to sit with the cool kids" is a forever thing, apparently!

I mean, I CAN get weirder...

Similar story - I was told our utility people would be entering with a master key to replace this and that. I told them "Don't do that, I shan't be home and my dog is not friendly". Building manager obliged.

And yet! Guess who attempted to enter and almost got sent to the ER via my dog?

It's too early for you to be such a rascal.

Thole. THOLE.