Collin Ryan

What are you doing, step-Bruh?

Chat LGPTQ++

Intentionally seal positively re-created recreations, shun creatively paused reels in tension always

Autothots and Decepticunts

OJ Simpson’s decaying hand finally fits in that glove

OJ Simpson to be buried in a Juice Cemetery

OJ Simpson’s football memorabilia finally removed from his cold dead hands

The Naked Gant

The ghost of Nicole Brown Simpson has taken out a restraining order. OJ must reman three eternities away at all times

OJ Simpson freed from this mortal coil to kill again!

OJ Simpson passed away today surrounded by loved ones who no longer fear for their lives

OJ Simpson escapes authorities yet again!

Bittersweet Caroline Symphony

Metallincolnpark “in the end, nothing else matters”

You know… it was a square table until Sir Cumcision came to Camelot

Super Mario Shart, Loo-uigi, Toad Stool Sample, Koopa’d My Pants, Pee right in a plant, Princess Pee-each

Nerd with a hard R

Shared mental illnesses:

We-pression
Anx-us-ety
Tri-polar
Psychosis and bro
Nervousnest
Two headaches are better than one
Anguish upon a star
Eleven-sion
Their-steria
Co-coping
People-ality disorder

*NSTINK - By By By Mennen

An-dry-geonous

I enjoy Mark Normand. He’s like Louis CK’s and Norm MacDonald’s love bastard

Micro do-si-do

He’s not like the other kids. He has to sit at the uns-table

Osteoporostitutes

The 75mg gummy I popped before going through airport security is kicking in. I don’t even board for another 90 minutes but I’m already flying lol

My last name pretty much means “nothing” in French. (Ryan -> Rien)

DID YOU KNOW? Freud was also a musician!! He used to be a concert percussionist for the Vienna Symphony orchestra, but he was fired for his overuse of phallic cymbals

Dry-curious

Diluted and deluded

“Imitation is the sincerest form of flattery” does not hold up in court against Identity Theft charges