for reference i tried to read “midnight duet” because i thought it was really funny to have a hallmark-ass “where am i going to get the money to save my family business!” story where they also fuck nasty. ms “jen comfort” do you see yourself as an adult? is that what you think adults sound like?

i’m upset that seemingly the filthiest books available to read right now are also the most childish. and not because of pearl clutching over “what if a kid reads it”. whatever. kids can know about sex. i’m upset because you should be a strong enough reader that you can’t stomach shitty writing!

why does every character act like they’re ambiguously somewhere between the ages of 30 and 12!? do the people you know in your real life act and talk like that??? they shouldn’t! and if they do, find some better adults to hang around!!

girls why are we reading at a third grade level? these books are anti-feminist and it’s not because they’re full of evil fornication scenes it’s because they’re talking to you like you’re stupid!!!!!!!!!

i tried to read one of those hallmark hetero smut books the girlies are always talking about online, and let me say: we are immediately shelving any of the popular discourse about the sexual content, we’ve got bigger fish to fry.

just like that? after I’ve been nothing but annoying to you?

you cant read auras stupid ass . you can barely read English

is there anything more “i’m the kid that moved to the city” than warning your family you only have oat milk when they ask for a cup of coffee.

genuinely terrifying that my physio needs me to work on my glutes because tbh this ass is so fat already that I have a hard time finding pants. girl please give a bitch a break.

why is kebab shop garlic sauce so extremely unmatched????

I shouldn’t have said this because I’ve now been hit with the worst full face acne breakout of my life. going back home is dangerous to your health.

i just witnessed jethro reach into his backpack and pull out a ziplock bag containing a pop tart that had been crushed to smithereens.

I said “why do you have that in there?” and he sombrely said “wish I knew” before returning it to the backpack.

i’ve been very like, jovial and unabashed about my deep love of wrestling lately, but I did just realize I packed 2 different wrestling tshirts for a weekend back in my hometown. So like, it’s a good thing I’m hot.

after all this talk online about how bush is in, I BETTER NOT be the only hairy bitch on the beach again this summer.

my culture is not your costume, cowards.

jethro, as him and i watch a teen emo couple on a date in the park: “do you think she ever gets to talk?”

2025