Two-piece Advocate

The real reason so many Indians are conservative is that they come from a country with a caste system, and most who can emigrate to the US are from the higher castes. A permanent underclass, assigned at birth, is perfectly normal to them, and they think their status from back home applies here.

“Boycott Indian businesses today” isn’t absolutely WILD thing to say. We can have a conversation about anti-blackness in the Indian community but a blanket call to boycott all Indian people is just racist

Their copying everything the Nazis did, right down to being blasted out of their minds on untested stimulants

People adopted “third wheel” because they were too stupid to understand the metaphor and there were usually three people involved. In hindsight, the widespread adoption of third wheel should’ve been our first sign that society was getting dumber

You know what expression drives me crazy, and I wish we had fought more vigorously against it years ago: third wheel.

The original expression was FIFTH WHEEL. Third wheel is dumb af because we actually have three-wheel vehicles.

Growing up is realizing I was only cold because I was poor. All that thinsulate and gore-tex shit from Chinatown was neither thinsulate nor gore-tex.

The children on TikTok are now arguing the Korean’s don’t actually shop at HMart

There’s a national epidemic that no one is talking about—people being in my fucking way. In my 50 years on this planet, we have never seen such a high rate of people in my way, all the fucking time

As simple as it may seem, the price tag is the greatest development in the history of consumer protection. It established a transparent marketplace, with non-discriminatory pricing, and forced businesses to compete on cost. Now, we’re devolving and every business is basically a shady auto mechanic.

Knife people: what’s your edc?

47k is NASTY work

If Giannis comes to NY and wins a title, I will name my first born son after him. The boy is only 11—he’ll get used to the new name.

100%, and I’m gonna go even further. Peak Kawhi Leonard is largely a figment of our imaginations. The disruptive defender and offensive assassins are two separate stages of his career, and may have 60 games of overlap

He can never be criticized for his teams under performing. He can never be criticized for his lack of availability. Literally none of the superstar narrative to him. He may* be the only no-stakes superstar of the modern era

*Jimmy Butler never had any expectations, but he was a tier down

I’m not taking anything away from the Toronto. He played like the best player in the world in that series, and won the championship. You can only beat the guys you play. BUT

With two FMVPs under his belt, the sports media collectively decided he’d proven enough, he got to be superstar emeritus

He won his first finals MVP as an excellent player, on a great team… the tail of the Spurs dynasty. He was not yet a superstar. That finals MVP is roughly equivalent to Jalen Brown’s FMVP. He played like a superstar in Toronto, but let’s not forget the Warriors lost KD and Clay in the finals.

Kawhi Leonard is the poster boy for winning the narratives lottery. Do you want two chips and 2F MVPs in a flukey/lucky manner, and has never been held to the standards or expectations of other superstars. Let me explain:

If you maintain highway speed in the Squirrel Hill Tunnel, you will awaken the tunnel monster

Cocoa butter perfume

You’ll notice that neither of the examples I listed can be categorized as people getting help they don’t need/deserve. Having animals where they don’t belong and violating mask mandates don’t actually help those people. They ONLY harm others.

This is only an issue when the accommodation itself can cause harm to others, e.g. non-service animals in public spaces or exemptions to mask mandates.

When you have the chance to cut the greatest player in the history of your franchise, in the middle of his farewell tour, cementing yourself as the worst of poverty franchises, you have to do it, right?

It took me a while to intellectualize why I don’t find his game appealing: there’s no quirk. Everyone else who’s held the crown has been a force of nature, eccentric genius or both. SGA just plays basketball very well, and it’s a chore to watch. It’s Normcore basketball

SGA is the most boring player to ever have a legitimate claim as best player in the world, and that includes Tim Duncan.

We need to have a real conversation about celebrities and Ozempic, because they are using that shit to give themselves eating disorders. I know a TON of people on GLP-1 meds, and NONE OF THEM get sickly thin. They just lose a healthy amount of weight.

A core problem for American liberalism is a constitutional inability to tell people who were important to the movement decades ago to go away because they're not relevant anymore.

Reagan/GW Bush admin people might as well not exist to the modern right. Maybe that's...something to consider.

It’s times like this when I wish I still had my Twitter, so I could go back and show people that I was right about Zion Williamson from the very beginning

Has there ever been a draft where TWO can’t-miss prospects flamed out

People wanna start claiming tall once they get above the median, but that’s not how life works. Being above the median income doesn’t make you rich, and being above median height doesn’t make you tall

The most charitable read I can muster for the Dems is that their primary focus is maintaining the status quo, no matter how miserable that is