Amy Farris

Writing the Soundtrack of Your Picture Book Five Whiz-Bang Ways Onomatopoeia Makes Your Children's Book Sing

Why am I sitting in a glorified quonset hut surrounded by screaming children? Are there bees in my brain? How many six-syllable words are even in my vocabulary? And what does all this have to do with picture books?

You know you want to find out…

Malicious compliance

The first time the Confederate flag ever paraded through the US Capitol was on January 6, 2021.

The first time the White House was damaged in over 200 years since the US rebuilt in the 1820s after the British burned it in the war of 1812 was mid October, 2025.

Arts and crafts stores stay in business precisely because of this phenomenon.

So I’ve heard, anyway. I have no firsthand experience with this at all.

You better have given him that treat. 😍

Thou shalt not support a man who bulldozes the White House to build himself a golden ballroom whilst the government is shut down because he doesn’t want the financial records tying him to Jeffrey Epstein to come out.

Tease.

For the first time since I was 15, I do not possess paper checks or a checkbook. I feel like I’ve just severed ties with Ebenezer Scrooge.

Dramatic Voices and Bad Foreign Accents - Embracing Absurdity in a Picture Book "Hedgehogs Don’t Wear Underwear" and the power of being a ridiculous raconteur

Everyone! I wrote a new thing!

Dramatic Voices and Bad Foreign Accents - Embracing Absurdity in a Picture Book

hearmeoutreviews.substack.com/p/dramatic-v...

Debunking the Myths: Responding to the Most Common Arguments for Book Censorship Book censorship arguments often disguise efforts to erase diverse voices. Responding with facts, empathy, and First Amendment values helps protect everyone’s right to read.

Very helpful myth debunking from the Freedom to Read Project. It succinctly offers responses to the main arguments posed by book banners.
www.freedomtoreadproject.org/debunking_th...

Hall of Phame: “King Alice” A book inside a book inside a blog

Can a picture book speak to multiple audiences? How do you write a book within a book without going all ‘Inception’? And what does all this have to do with keeping your sanity during snow days? To find out, check out my latest post!

National Terrorism Advisory System Bulletin - June 22, 2025 | Homeland Security

NEW: The DHS has issued a heightened terror threat for Americans. Good thing we have that 22 year old former gardener in charge of counterterrorism and DHS is busy with mass deportation. www.dhs.gov/ntas/advisor...

Annoyingly FABULOUS Picture Books of 2025 (So Far): Picture Books Are WAY Too Good This Year and I Am Taking It As a Personal Attack This ain't a golden age of picture books anymore. We've gone platinum.

"Annoyingly FABULOUS Picture Books of 2025 (So Far)"

bit.ly/3HuIN03

Well, son...

Am I the only one who sees a grumpy tree here?

Opinion | George Saunders: Shame on the White House

The pen is mightier than the sword. Especially in the hands of Saunders.

Kennedy Swims in Washington Creek That Flows With Sewage and Bacteria

I legit thought this was a metaphor at first.

Phew, for a Minute There, I Thought the Arts Were Going to Get Too Much Funding “Dozens of US arts organizations have been notified that offers of government grants have been terminated, hours after Donald Trump proposed elimin...

"I mean, what were we thinking, letting children paint murals on underpasses? Handing out grants to novelists with weird names like Marisol or Devin? Some of them were using metaphors. OPENLY."

Phonic Punch Phundamentals: Play it Again, Sam Strategic repetition for short attention spans

Am I capable of using “caesura” or “bumfuzzle” correctly in a sentence? Why am I singing along with a chorus of chickens? Most importantly, do you hear that echo? 🤔

The answers to these pressing questions and more can be found in my latest post. 👇🏻👇🏻

hearmeoutreviews.substack.com/p/phonic-pun...

If the fifth are going to take revenge, clearly I should go ahead and hand that second margarita. Happy Sith de Mayo everyone!

Most parents don’t enjoy reading to their children, survey suggests Report from Nielsen and HarperCollins shows that parents see reading as a literacy skill, rather than something to encourage their children to love

This is dog damn depressing. If the Berenstain Bears or Babar were still the highlights of kid lit, I could understand this.

BUT👏 THEY'RE 👏NOT👏

I want to whack these parents over the head with any one of the many beautiful, clever, hilarious picture books available on the market today.

Sith I have cause, and will, and strength, and means
To do’t.

Your brain on a book is much better than an egg in a frying pan.

Hi, I’m God.

Jesus and I are very much against the defunding of childhood cancer research.

I got an email today saying that my local library is soon going to be open seven days a week! So, big shout out to @kcls.bsky.social for that and everything else they do in the community!

“The Café at the Edge of the Woods” - A Phonic Punch Pheast for the Senses ...and an object lesson on the need for a business plan.

Why do we need street signs in picture books? When is it okay to serve pickled bat with a hint of saffron? And what does this all have to do with my taking an hour to select the PERFECT font for my kid’s birthday party invitations? Click it and check it, baby. 👇🏻👇🏻

“Shall I compare thee to a summer’s day? I really don’t have much choice: We barely get spring anymore, and that’s only in the North Pole. I miss birds.” 🤣🤣🤣