Rain

They say the eyes are the window to your soul and I wish I was totally comfortable with people seeing all of mine

Today I wondered whether my inability to keep eye contact really comes from neurodivergence or rather from not yet unlearned shame. 👀

dangerous how the beginning of February, a full moon, and some sunlight makes me feel like I'm miraculously cured of everything™

Trying to glorify my #longcovid crash by framing it as being successful at this ⬇️

*fully lost in discursive mazes* youre not really cis unless you take cross sex hormones

then again, as one of my partners pointed out, the very same retailer also discontinued me, so that's only being consistent I guess

(as in fired because of my disabilities)

They discontinued my favourite cookies 😭 2025 really isn't ingratiating itself with me, even in it's old days

Can I have some of that solstice new moon cleansening new beginning vibe ✨☁️

... you know, in a slutty way

I just wanna be my softest self, cozily cuddled up with a hot water bottle - all winter long ☁️✨

okay this looks like Caleb and Frumpkin to me, but then again my mind is fully M9 poisoned at the moment

*advertisment voice* this mental health here is barely kept alive by house plants and Christmas lights

oh look who hit rock bottom so hard they found the back door to Christmas spirit ✨

✨ it's me

This is so funny to me because I'm neurodivergent and struggle so much with eye contact, I have to choose one eye I lock in on 👀

I explained to both my partners that #longcovid to me feels like being shrinked to mouse size but having to navigate the same world.
And both of them answered that if I were mouse sized, they could put me in their breast pocket to stay cozy and now I'm mad I'm not actually mouse sized.

#polyamory

Over the last few days I cried through an entire roll of toiletpaper (tissues can't contain the flood of tears and snot that is me. Also, they feel inefficient.)
Sometimes being disabled, queer and polyamorous just sucks and there is no pride and glory and rainbows in it. Period.

Things that make #longcovid bearable:

A partner and I started watching Our Flag Means Death this weekend (ik I'm very late to the party as always) and today I treated myself to a walk along the lake listening to Ye Banished Privateers so I've got a new pirate era going on for me

#nerd #polyamory

today this involved being restrained with my big big comfort hoody (which obv is his, technically) WHILE STILL WEARING IT so my dysphoric #trans ass was happy, too ☕✨

✨☕ getting the hang on being #kinky despite #longcovid

I'm surprised how well it works out being degraded and someone's plaything while lying on my back mostly and not over exerting myself in the process.

As someone who thrives on touch and time spent together physically, I really suck at the whole ldr thing.
Then again I can listen to my comet's 2 am radio live show from across the world at 4 pm my time.
And then it all feels poetic and romantic again.

✨☕

#polyamory #ldr

On top of my #adhd and #endometriosis, my new companion #longcovid forces me to rest and be bored a lot of the time (not exactly #nre inducing).

Thought I'd might as well come back to bsky and start microblogging about navigating #polyamory and #kink in my #spoonie situation.

Went on an accidental bsky hiatus and found this as my last post coming back.
So a lil update:
4 months smoke free, 1 month sober ✌️😗
still looking to kinkify that tho 👉👈🥺

trying to quit smoking atm might as well kinkify it

I never got the whole polyamory & leftovers thing* but I think I got a taste of that today.

No food tastes better then what your love and the meta you're very fond of cooked up together 💕

☕✨ #polyamory

*as a European I still think it makes most sense in the American setting it was born in

I love the intersection of being polyamorous and neurodivergent.

Someone I date just texted me from their vaycays saying "I found the cadaver of a goat in a cave, wanna see a picture?"

Well hello, of course I do!! 🐐☠️

#polyamory #adhd

@dantejoestar.bsky.social: I always think of you!

me: aww, am I your Roman Empire?

him: Falling apart at the seams?
Barely holding it together?
Used to be pagan, turned Christian, but something feels off?
All over the place?

I swear I love it when he roasts me like that 🥰

#polyamory