🪐✨

one day, some day, i’ll learn how to cook for one. today was not that day

they diagnosed her with lymphoma. we’ve got a year at the absolute best, but she’s down to 5.5lbs because the mass in her belly is so large. not hoping for more than a few months but if we get a year, my gods. heaven

i’m not ready, dude. find out this afternoon how much time we’ve got. if i come home without her that might be my final reason

scheduling that quality of life vet appointment fucking broke me. yes, i’m absolutely crying at work

my grouchy punk-ass baby is dying and i’m not handling it well 😔

rescue baby has discovered the joys of the #botm box 🥺

we still have beyer, though! and i take solace in that. woman is a gift to the fandom. have had to retreat to high fantasy as a respite these last many years, however, bc years of trek novels have absolutely fucked my brain. stay collecting those voy novels tho, however sparse they are these days

oh, hard same. don’t think i’ve read a trek novel since before dishonor, and that one pissed me OFF

did mine on google drive for that very reason lol. it took way too long to do to lose to a crashed external. she’s indestructible now 😂

relatable! the artsy in me wants to bujo things, but the perfectionist in me will not allow the potential destruction of a pretty notebook because of one wonky pen stroke. the clean lines of excel are a damn siren song

does anyone else make a spreadsheet of their tbr? bc like yeah, storygraph and goodreads are great, but a spreadsheet? gods, the power

a tribute of fire by sariah wilson is the perfect example of why i hate series because what do you MEAN i have to wait until july for the next part

oooh. well. doesn’t hurt less, hurts different

can’t; you hurt me, too

SO MUCH LIFE, MARIS

wait, no

the one thing you’ve got. is elbows.

one of my favorite games is “how did this get published?!”

the next few weeks are my personal purgatory so idk if my brain will have the bandwidth for a trilogy until after the new year lol. but i’ll start with odw (you were so excited lmao) then do cob after this hell season is over. thank you!!

plus grimstone and monarch, but those look like they need to be read on a deserted island gatdam. what i REALLY want to read isn’t out in paperback for another eight months and i’m itching

purple are the ones i’ve read but haven’t moved into storage to make room for the new goodies

been on far too strong of a buying and not actually reading streak lately, so now all these tasty stories are bursting shelves and i’ve no idea what to read next. there’s too many options

trust that you’ll be the first i scream at them about. might even get a text play by play, who knows

i bought it a year ago but haven’t gotten around to it yet. just been collecting dust while i stretched my legs in the fantasy/fae/magic/dragon verses the last few months lol. but that’s good to know while i wait for the paperback to release!

also kineseo tape! i don’t understand how it works but it does. i can walk you through some tapes if you want to give it a shot. it’s a cheap and easy way to relieve some of the pressure and tension

if you can still stand and support your upper half during a flare, you’re winning. sound bath or binaural meditations (anc headphones a must) paired with 4-7-8 breathing exercises have also helped manage smaller episodes for me in the past

when it flares big for me i literally cannot support my upper body at all, am bent at 90°, and have to drag myself crying to urgent care for a steroid shot. but i have 20mm herniations on l2-s1 and degenerative disk disease/almost no cartilage left and need a fusion

if it’s a mild to moderate muscular flare, sometimes laying on the floor with your legs on the sofa cushions can help decompress. inversion, if an option, is also great, along with 2 tylenol and 2 ibuprofen

next question: muscular, or nerve pain? when i have a nerve pain flare it feels like someone is holding a blow torch to my back. for nerve pain literally the only thing i’ve found that helps is thc. not cbd. thc is an absolute miracle for nerve pain (i can’t take anything stronger than toradol)