Lax Luthor

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We Asked A Bunch of Coked Up Rich Kids What They Think About Politics. Their Answer Might Surprise You

Nobody: we’re having pork chops tonight
My Brain: Pooork chopsh’s & apple shaush
*Damn you Peter Brady

Bakers always say the secret ingredient is love, but I’m pretty sure it’s butter.

Hang in there, Nancy Mace.

✋🏻

Just like that Cheap Trick song: "The sex police
They live inside of my head
The sex police
They come to me in my bed
The sex police
They're coming to arrest me, oh no"

We DO NOT throw perfectly good food away in this house.

We put leftovers in a Tupperware & let it go bad, THEN throw it out!

No "and"

ME: and make mine a double

WAITER: your..your tater tots?

ME: you heard me

"Spikey" 🤣🤣🤣

Somebody Should Do Something About All The Problems
theonion.com/somebody-sho...

It's the "why" for me.

a cloak believed to belong to the shooter transformed into a dozen beautiful white doves and flew away, Authorities said,

And that was the beginning of the end of American news media... like the healthcare - Reagan ruined both for all...

Never forget what MAGA did to OUR house. And how they replaced OUR Flag, with his.

It is absurd and obscene to suggest the only way our military can project strength is to appoint as its leader a guy whose own mother called an abusive POS.

And you can't explain it away as "boys be wild."

I will never, ever get over this.

I always thought they were a precursor to spaghettification.

Steven Tyler doesn’t look well folks. Thoughts and prayers 🙏🏽

doctor: make sure you drink plenty of fluids

me: that’s literally all i drink

Oh shit. Fucking Roseanne is gonna get a cabinet post isn’t she? 👀