Just popping out to LIDL, or 50-1-500-50 as the Romans called it.

Bram Stoker 1847-1912 A PENGUIN SINCE 1979

This frontispiece in my book just made me laugh a lot. Is this Buddhist reincarnation, or some other form of afterlife?

Oh you absolutely useless wankers

A genuine post here, but Abide With Me before the cup final is one of football's best traditions.

I've invented a new word.

Plagiarism.

My mum wanted a baby seal for Mother’s Day so we all clubbed together

Since Trump fired most of the National Park Service, the bears have to pick up the slack.

“Alaskan bear corrects a fallen roadside cone”

Credit @gunsnrosesgirl X

@altnps.bsky.social

Howay the lads!!

How did I know they’d cast me as Quasimodo in the school play? Let’s just say I had a hunch.

‘Free speech’ latest…

Zelensky's finest achievement to date may be in not lamping these cunts

Did Dave Chappelle’s Rick James come up with this ad?

Regardless of who loses tonight, at least you’re not Drake.

Smith should retire. 9999 is Bradmanesque. #AUSvIND 🏏

Happy new year everyone. You’re all great, in some way. Each one of you has a weirdness - a superpower if you want to see it that way - that no-one else has. There’s no perfect, archetypal human. A species is the sum of its parts. And yet, as just one human, you are: special.

Hypothetically, of course, if one does a good deed (eg, giving directions to a confused elderly man, say), does that deed retain the quality of ‘goodness’ even if it subsequently emerges that the directions given were inadvertently completely wrong by about 180 degrees or does the deed become bad?

If Time must name a 'Person Of The Year' they ought to show their working by ranking all of us on earth from one to eight billion. Like the world rankings in tennis or snooker. We'd all know where we stood.

Cartoon: two men chatting. One, holding something in his hands says "I've made a model of Mount Everest”. The second asks "To scale?". He replies "No, just to look at".

There’s a version of this going round on Facebook. Here’s the original. It’s by… me!

Furthermore, if you like it, I can draw one for you!

https://www.worldofmoose.com/products/everest-cartoon

Lord of the Rings and Christmas Lights with a beer = perfect

Ah. Knew that would do it.

You really do run out of words to describe Joe Root

Since the start of 2023, only 9% of balls bowled to a number 11 by England would have hit the stumps. I feel there’s a quick fix there.

I love watching snooker. It's the only sport where the crowd don't know how to react until the commentator tells them. Imagine in football if a goal went in and the crowd sit in silence until they hear a commentator say what a great effort it was.

Round round get a round I get a round.

Tray tray need a tray I need a tray.

The Beach Boys down the pub.

Jacob Bethell has more T20I fifties than Ben Stokes.

Jacob Bethell has made the step up to international cricket look easy and it’s so fun to watch

Full Moon tonight. Beautiful to look but remember to wear moontan lotion to prevent moonburn