Kiltan K.

MY TWEETS, MY BEAUTIFUL TWEETS! OH WHERE HATH MY TWEETS GONE? I AM BESIDE MYSELF FOR WORRY OVER MY LITTLE CHIRPS

"Consider, please: The noble snail - Nature's slowest steed. A foot is all he is, But a foot is all he needs. He's man of house and home (And lady of a manor); He's ever wont to roam, And always with a gentle manner. He is polite and friend to all - Tip your hat if you should see him! A snail on every garden wall A merry garden makes to be in!"

"Hot worms, sir?" I ask the gentleman leaving the bathroom stall.
"Ah, worm-boy. Sounds good," he says.
I pass him a handful of steaming worms. He squeezes them into a lump between his hand, the ichor coating his fingers. He hands me back the remains and leaves the bathroom with a whistle.

my counter argument is as follows (presented by the world's worst poster):

I have a rich inner world - it stinks! I want an inner world where I can pretend to be a spaceship captain or something, instead my inner worlds are like 'I'm a bog worm. there's a centuries long history of bogworm societies that my brain can make up on the spot. we're at war with the earwig people'

Congratulations on once again successfully creating Life! a feat many alchemists could only dream of, as they bled into their vials of Prima Materia. Give my fondest birthday wishes to your newborn son, may joy be the angel of his days down here on earth.

Burning Man: acid riders and partiers engaged in bohemian revelry and debauchery. No man is actually burned. Offends the gods.

Wicker Man: attended by the pillars of the community. Wholesome celebration of springtime. A cop is burned to death as tribute, ensuring a bountiful harvest for all.

Come on down to Big Red Al's Supermart! we're raising prices, that's right, fuck you, we're raising prices! Nothing's fresh and the staff hate you! you will drive 7.6 miles to get here, because we put every other store out of business! Big Red Al will fuck your wife - he'll kill your dog! Eat shit!

We'd get regular hoppers all the time, though:

Nosed grasshopper. I was excited over this one, because they are rare around here, I've only ever seen two of these in my life.

Hey man hand me that bag of Sny- AAAAAaaaHHHHHHHHHhh

This is an ant. Specifically, it's a male dorylus, or driver ant. Males of ant species often retain a more 'primordial' look reflecting earlier evolutionary traits, they tend to look more 'waspy'. These guys just look like goofy sausage bugs, however.

A pillar of caters. These are some kind of moth I think. Every autumn the station would fill up with these little guys. Spiky.

(Warning, bugs)
A slow, leisurely of thread of bugs I've found and taken pictures of at work throughout the years. Don't know enough about bugs to tell you what specific bugs they are. I'll be adding to this periodically.
Below: opilione of some kind (cutie).

"No, no, I mean, like a pekinese."

>"I am from the city of Peking. What did you mean by this?

"No, uh, you know, like a husky"

>"I am a husk, a shell of a man. What are you getting at?"

Help, help! I'm being perceived!

What the hell even goes on here on May, if there's no meltdowns?? Just regular posting? just Regular Posts May?

All I ever wanted out of life is a comically large mug that says 'Yes I need THIS MUCH coffee' on it, and God fucked me on that one, too.

On a scale of 1.0 to 13.1, how interested would you be in watching a video, or potentially a series of videos, explaining the different factions and goings on of that war, delivered in a sort of weirdly accented mumble mouth voice?
I've been tossing the idea around to get into youtube videos.

Quintin Tarantino voice: Fantastic Feets and Where to Find Them

Russ Meyer voice: Fantastic Breasts and Where to Find them

Orson Wells voice: Fantastic Feasts and Where to Find Them

[guy whose brains have long melted into a gooey soup that slushes out of his ears every time he walks voice]: uh, summer is SUPPOSED to be hot.

Beloit looks like someone tried to spell 'Detroit' with a 0.15 blood alcohol level

Sometimes you want to post away from twitter because it's a nazi infested shihole, sometimes you want to post away form twitter because hideo kojima decided to retweet 500 posts all at once and it's your entire timeline now

cookies are called that because you cook them. That's so fucked up. That's like calling noodles 'boilies', or potato chips 'fries'.

This would never happen to me. Even if I were temporary without my misery vittles, I would simply stay in the good graces of Henry Kissinger to keep a steady supply of immortality tincture on hand at all times.