Nixie: Now starring in the submarine thriller Das Boop.

Not all heroes wear capes. But you deserve one.

Only if Vernor Hertzog narrates it.

Gonna be super great.

Klassy.

Help! I got worried and my ears fell off!

I will miss his appearances on the podcast. A podcast with slides and Milkshake.

Trump, buddy. Those Ukrainians are getting really good with their drones. Just saying.

I want a game to measure distances in smoots.

Being a masshole is a sacred responsibility we take very seriously. Mocking idiots is a part of our charge.

Things suck. Here is the Dowager Empress, enjoying her chair.

What do you know about genocide? It’s not like studying history is useful. 😜

From Midas Touch.

[runs off to paint target on own head.]

Derp, derp, derp. Am hooman. I sleep on pillow like hooman.

I’m so grateful for his insight and elegant command of language.

Yoink tried to raid a food item for the first time. Mind you, it was a bowl of Creme Patisserie that I’d put outside to cool, so you can’t really blame him. Who, me?

Get fucked is wrong. Getting fucked could have some potential to be nice. They deserve nothing nice.

Get in, bitches. I’m driving.

She has cauliflower ears from how often she scratches herself. And if they ever luminol my car, I’m getting arrested for sure.

Full on Shitting Ass Disease for them. After eating corn and hot sauce.

I’ve got astigmatism and light text on dark page is a nightmare.

It didn’t crash, it’s just trying a space launch via Jersey barrier.

We should never have given up on the Restoration of the South.

Once again, Nix is covered in blood. She’s never let a bramble patch get in the way of a good bunny chasing.

I’m calling it Sharpie-nacht. Or the Night of the Long Markers.

As my dogs say “Why is Sky Dog growling at me?!”

Pick ‘em up and squeeze like a tube of poop toothpaste!

I’m the Peg who gave Alex the idea. It’s a great game!

Sometimes I wish the Crippled Eagles still existed so we had somewhere to send these fucknuts.