Eòsaph🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿

Wrapped says I am and always will be a riot grrrlie

Sup

It's 7⁰C - how is it December in Scotland?

Unhinged Toddlers on those baby leash things will never not be hilarious

My jaws sore, so I ripped the crusts off my sandwich and flung them in a decomposition bin walking past. Some middle aged man starts aggressively lecturing me about wasting food. He was left gagged when I told him to mind his fucking business. Not everything requires ur damn input

Prof Hannah Fry is probably my favourite science communicator (and it's not because she's also a redhead)

Tell me this bitter old queen ain't fruity. This could be an Untucked monologue

Miss Piggy FTW

mr. burns from the simpsons says excellent on a pink background ALT: mr. burns from the simpsons says excellent on a pink background

Hahahahaha

Gonna start replying to H word with "Why are you herniated? What happened?!"

Just to be a menace

Enduring the Wicked press tour against my will on every fyp is like shitting out a pinecone. When will it end

Fuck bein her any day #legohair

Who in good conscience opts to be a traffic warden?

Your whole job is just to ruin peoples day.

Granted I know the conditions of capitalism force people into things but like idk be a cleaner or something.

If you willingly became a traffic warden not out of necessity I have no respect for u

Note on household analogies

The very first thing the Prime Minister does is use the household budget metaphor.

A metaphor - this report into BBC coverage - said could be "easily misleading."

Why is the government trying to mislead the country?

Not to be super woke but I hate the concept of charities. Why do we just accept that governments offload their responsibility to look after the vulnerable? Why are charities and volunteers cleaning up their mess while they take our money and still have extortionate salaries?? We are being clowned 🤡

Judging by the hacking cough I'm thinking it's more likely RSV

Winter can get in the bin

a cartoon character says curses in front of fire ALT: a cartoon character says curses in front of fire

I'm ill

I’m tired of misogynistic gay men. We need to be better

When he opens his mouth to unleash his dunning-kreuger effect

My new favourite closedown phrase is: "imagine having the time to care about this"

You're too kind 🫣 thank you

To the twink who just looked me up and down in the bus station

Divine would agree

#notlegaladvice

That's frustrating. In which case the cheeky prick should be glad a gentle word to a pal is aw he's dealt with!

Our judicial system is pish

Exactly!! Annoyed at you talking about it what a brass neck I'd have them on blast for the rest of their life 😂

I was meaning people have done jail time for less as in a response to stuff like that being done to them 😂

He's lucky that's all you did!!! There's people done jail time for less