Chrissie Bee

No cheating. Post the last pic of your pet.

“Oedipus, trapped in a prophecy he never saw coming…”

Ok, but he did though?

Without coconut it’s not hedgehog slice! It would just be hog flavoured ice cream. Nobody wants that!

Me: I’ve gotten so much done this week!

Also me: You mean like putting your clothes away? Folding the laundry that’s taking up the massive dining table? Writing? Preparing for the weekend activities?

Me: …

Me: I made BRACELETS!

Watson: Sherlock… hey, hey, hey Sherlock … hey, Sherlock … what do they call primary school in America?

Looking up ways to warm my feet when they start going numb and this is from the AI overview.

Image description: a screenshot that reads “consider other measures: you can also try placing your feet under your armpits or using a heating pad.”

I thought that was the point!

People are all like “go outside your comfort zone, it’ll be good for you”, but I like my comfort zone. It’s comfortable!

You know what? You can even quarter-ass the vacuuming! You can put as little ass into vacuuming as physically possible, and still say “I’ve done the vacuuming!”

Massages in advertising: calm, comfortable, the height of luxury

Massages IRL: being very slowly beaten to a pulp while soft instrumental music plays.

Just heard: “You can’t put the jack back in the box”

Apparently I have misunderstood the purpose of jack-in-the-boxes.

Ok, but what about high speed trains on the orcas? Or high speed orcas on the trains. Maybe the orcas are the trains? I think we can make this work!

The worst part is, there’s two of them and only one of me - I’m automatically outnumbered!

It’s 2am…ish

Legs: hey. Hey! Know what we should do?

Me: Sleep?

Legs: haha no silly! We should dance the cancan!

Having a lie down because I’m tired and overstimulated.

Saphira cat came for a rare snuggle, all happy and purring… and then SNEEZED ALL OVER MY FACE.

I just can’t with today.

It is now!

Why is it called sportsmanship and not athletiquette?

a woman is sitting at a desk in front of a computer and saying no shaft . Alt: Emily in The Devil Wears Prada movie sitting at her desk shrugging and saying “No. Shan’t.”

Hairdresser: Go this way.

My hair: OMG, of course, that’s a great idea! You’re basically a genius!

Me: Go this way.

My hair:

Buy or make a *really* nice custard. Maybe get yourself some vanilla ice cream - the good stuff.

Eat the custard and ice cream, and give the fruit cake away.

Things I’ve tried to make this story work:

- glaring at it
- pouting
- stamping my foot
- grumbling loudly
- drinking a *lot* of caffeine
- crying a little bit
- giving it the silent treatment.

Things I haven’t tried:

- writing it.

Seriously, where am I going wrong?!

I know people say “don’t cry over spilled milk”, but the cat knocked half a glass of milk all over the bed right when I was contemplating a nap, and this feels tear-worthy!

Do it. Be the change you want to see in the world.

Although, while writing the above post I did accidentally type ‘kinky’ instead of ‘kindly’, which very much would have undermined the power of my words!

As always, there are exceptions to the rule 🤣

Friendly reminder that we all make spelling and grammatical errors on occasion.

These errors don’t undermine the power of our words.

Pointing out others’ mistakes, no matter how kindly, is unhelpful and unnecessary.

Pauli Murray.

My son reminded me:

"Just because you don't know your impact, doesn't mean your not having one."

It took 20 years for Pauli Murray to learn that it was their legal strategy that led to the end of segregation. Let that sink in.

Your effort matters more than you'll ever know.

What an incredible person!

If you're a writer who wants to learn about POV, this thread is for you!

A brilliant example of second-person POV used for powerful effect is A Glasshouse of Stars by Shirley Marr.

Thinking about the future and jet packs will give me so many new ways to injure myself through clumsiness.