Fork Tongued Lizard Witch 🦎

I wish someone could go back in time and tell 13-year-old-me that one day she'd be 31, dancing around with her dog singing the same Fall Out Boy songs.

Not to be vulnerable on the internet or anything, but I can't tell if I'm happy or sad anymore. It kind of all feels the same.

And just for tax - fuck this countries economy, I want to throw myself and my car off of a cliff

But at least I have a header coming in the mail and I'm sure installing it will be a shit show and a half and I look forward to that crash out.

On the realest of the real though I'm so mad I never bought the Skunk2 header for my car when I was debating doing it years ago. Now I can't get a Skunk2 or an Invidia

Well, you know what they say....

When all else fails, completely remove your catalytic converter and downpipe your car 🙃

PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE

Happy Tuesday.

I'm so mad I can hear my own heartbeat.

She was thinking Mr. Right.
I was thinking right now.

I miss a lot of my friends honestly. I miss spending time with them. And bonfires. And getting absolutely sideways drunk and trying to swim. And watching anime together. Going makeup shopping together 🥲🥲🥲🥲🥲🥲🥲🥲

Ngl I miss my guy best friend so bad I want to go down to Florida and kick his car and tell him I miss him, let his girlfriend know she is SO pretty, and then cry in traffic back home.

> Bedroom cleaned
> Plant chores done
> Kitchen cleaned
> Two loads of laundry *mostly* done
> Held true to monitoring my food intake
> Saved hella workout stuff on TikTok for calisthenics

> My back hurts

The relationship I have with the wild mushroom soup at Publix could damn near be studied at this point. It is so fucking good 😭😭

I was a dick
It is what it is
A habit to kick
The age-old curse
I tend to laugh whenever I'm sad
I stare at the crash, it actually works.
Making amends
This shit never ends
I'm wrong again

Wrong again.

(The grip this song has on me is borderline painful)

Literally power, water, wifi, security system, Hulu, Paramount +, my cell phone, Amazon Prime, Scentbird, Google Pay.....like bitch wtf I probably have shit I'm still forgetting about.

I've been through a lot of shit in my life but honestly one of the worst thing to ever happen to me is my debit card expiring and me having to update all my auto-draft bills for every single subscription and monthly housing bill that exists.

TLDR - my house is finally starting to shape up and look like MY HOUSE instead of just this stupid building I have to pay well over $1,000 to exist in every single month. And this is such a milestone for me.

I'm just...... I'm so fucking proud of myself. I'm proud of how I've saved. I'm proud of how I've carried myself in such a way at work I have friendships with people like my new carpenter who has been a blessing.

**I did this** with my hard work and personality and drive and saving and tenacity.

My pergola that was totally dilapidated.....REPLACED. Granted with basically a lean-to but it's replaced! It's new! I can do whatever I want to it to customize it without a storm rolling through and pushing it over.

Not to mention part of why I had such a struggle was money. I can finally afford to fix my house closer to my standards.

The window my dog busted out???? I WAS FINALLY ABLE TO PAY TO REPLACE IT.

The fence has been re-secured and the worst boards are replaced so it looks nice.

Even after I hired / paid for an entire dump truck to come to my house to throw away the immense amount of shit that was just garbage in my house I couldn't get those tires removed.

I can finally look in my backyard and not see a permanent reminder of a relationship and break up that FUCKED me up

My ex very purposely left tires in my yard that I've been fighting for 4 years to get removed. They're FINALLY gone. The VERY LAST PIECE OF MY EX AT MY HOUSE IS GONEEEEE. The thing I know he probably was the most proud about leaving because disposal is so hard.

Taking advantage of my maybe 10 followers here but

I HAVE FINALLY *finally* after 4 years been able to "re-claim" my back yard and I normally don't cry and truthfully haven't cried about it but my soul is definitely crying because FUCK YES I DID IT.

I'm so glad I opted to have a 401k when I started my job 4 years ago because everyone kept bullying me to do it.

Anyways how about that stock market crash?

There's something so rewarding in getting your yard mowed and weed packed so you don't have to do it on your day off.

Bonus round of rewarding for getting to sit outside listening to music watching birds DECIMATE my freshly filled bird feeders.

And because I'm kind of on a "running out of time" ordeal when it comes to my current car...I'm going to take it SO personally that it's going to force me to settle for something I don't really want. Or something I'm not even nearly as interested in. It may be dumb but it has me SO in my feelings.

I so much so hate that I'm finally at a point where I can save for a car and the cars I want aren't even out of this world to ask for and because of inflation they're all basically 50k cars now.

7 years ago

I miss having yellow hair sooooooo much it hurts 🥲🥲🥲🥲

Lüften and chill chore day to get some fresh air and energy into the house.

The birds are chirping.
My dog is intermittently sunbathing.
I'm doing random chores while attempting to find the one thing I need to complete the chore I wanted to do today.

I need 5 more days like this at least.

Plant chore day
Plant chore day
Plant chore day
🪴 🌱 🌿 🌾 🌵