Better Things Are Possible

My brain is for foraging for little treats, maybe outsmarting the occasional predator in the savanna. It's not meant to see The Worst Things On Earth every day

What happened to men's rights activists. Are we done, did we get all the rights

The Democratic Party's formula for the last 50 years has been "Let's be friendly with extreme wealth and maybe we can also get modest policy wins sometimes." The last 10 years and this year in particular should be conclusive proof of how badly this has failed. But we're stuck with it anyway

Huge scandal, immediately impeachable. But of course in context of all his other crimes you just shrug

One of the many reasons AI can't produce good writing is it can't hate its own writing. It can't think to itself "Maybe I'm illiterate" during the writing process. And that's essential

I firmly believe that talking normally to strangers on the internet preserves *my* mental health. If I was on here yelling at people every day my brain would be mashed potatoes by now

government exercise....what's next...the government kills you??

Winning the Cold War only to blow yourself up for no reason 30 years later is such a good bit

Preview of news program with title "who should be fed chair?"

Nobody. I do not think you can eat chair

Make no mistake,

not even much of a pop lol

Scientists now believe that the human brain--a magic goo for worrying--can also be used to do other things

Being annoying on your own timeline is free speech. Being annoying in someone's replies is harassment. Quote posts are a gray area of the law still being developed

hell yeah brother

Can't remember if it was this bad before COVID but I'm seeing an alarming spreading of what I'll call Airport Behavior to other public places. Obliviousness to other people's existence, ineptitude at navigating the environment. "Is this your first time at the grocery store" type stuff

Billionaires already live in a magical reality where they're exempt from consequences for fraud, criminality, antisocial behavior. But that's not enough. Everyone else must be forced to live according to their precepts and be at the mercy of their whims. Perverse!

I'm going to invent a stronger form of hanging out. Prescription strength hanging out

Elon Musk is worse at hiding it but this is the problem with all billionaires: they are a threat to democratic governance. They have an insatiable need to own and control everything. If you want to be free you have to curb their power, and demand political leaders who understand that

The reason you sprinkle posts like "The brain is the Ass of the head" throughout your timeline is to preserve the insanity plea in case you ever need it

hello liza

I received an "F" on my dental school paper for writing "the tooth fairy takes 'em while you sleep" and now I'm suing the school for religious discrimination

Whole party afflicted by the same thing unfortunately

No one has scammed and beclowned the human race like cats. "Aww she's sitting on me" she's sapping your energy. "Aww she's purring" she's communicating with the devil, her father in hell

Until recently every CEO was saying "AI" and I think we'll go from that to companies pitching their products as "NO AI in this!" in record time. New category of unleaded consumer products

Euclid is known as the "father of geometry" because he got a triangle pregnant

Building muscle is mostly about diet. If you want to get big you have to eat other people at the gym

you wanted a failson samurai, well

You never want to hit someone with the nuclear "As stated previously" in an email but sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do

thinking about how much you'd have to pay me to read this book. at least equivalent to two weeks' pay i think