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WulfHelm

@wulfhelm.bsky.social

Bretwalda of the Angli. Generous host of the Mead Hall Lord of Wülferhampton. Please use your Gods responsibly. Hinc videre possum domum tuam.

7,054 Followers  |  7,348 Following  |  12,744 Posts  |  Joined: 23.08.2023  |  1.9391

Latest posts by wulfhelm.bsky.social on Bluesky

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a woman sitting at a desk with the words " what a weirdo " written on the bottom ALT: a woman sitting at a desk with the words " what a weirdo " written on the bottom
01.02.2026 18:16 — 👍 1    🔁 0    💬 0    📌 0

Pervert.

01.02.2026 18:15 — 👍 0    🔁 0    💬 0    📌 0
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a man says i 'm here to help in a dark room ALT: a man says i 'm here to help in a dark room
01.02.2026 18:11 — 👍 0    🔁 0    💬 0    📌 0

Your Bretwalda reviews Melania

A vapid pile of wank directed by an alleged abuser featuring a former porn star turned poundshop Jadis

Honestly, I'd rather listen to @themeadhallbard.bsky.social sing Milli Vanilli's back catalogue on loop whilst having my nuts sliced by a rusty mandolin, forever

01.02.2026 18:11 — 👍 14    🔁 3    💬 6    📌 1
Post image

Relevant:

lifeiswoohoo.net/@mookie/1159...

01.02.2026 12:43 — 👍 37    🔁 8    💬 4    📌 1
Post image 01.02.2026 11:11 — 👍 3    🔁 0    💬 0    📌 0

Andrew Mountbatten-Windsor. He never reigns but he paws.

01.02.2026 08:54 — 👍 50    🔁 9    💬 1    📌 0
01.02.2026 11:01 — 👍 36    🔁 1    💬 4    📌 0

We're not related.

But yes.

31.01.2026 22:01 — 👍 4    🔁 0    💬 1    📌 0

Anyway.

I meed my beauty...

Sleep.

I need to sleep.

Fuck off.

31.01.2026 22:01 — 👍 46    🔁 0    💬 10    📌 1

No one cares.

31.01.2026 21:56 — 👍 1    🔁 0    💬 0    📌 0

Rotund.

That's a nice word, isn't it children?

31.01.2026 21:54 — 👍 25    🔁 0    💬 8    📌 1
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a man is peeking through a pair of wooden doors . ALT: a man is peeking through a pair of wooden doors .

I'm not entirely sure what lesbian biscuits are, but....

31.01.2026 20:58 — 👍 25    🔁 2    💬 13    📌 1

That was, I think, his point.

31.01.2026 20:52 — 👍 1    🔁 0    💬 1    📌 0

Hounds.

Eat this one first.

31.01.2026 20:51 — 👍 14    🔁 0    💬 1    📌 0

Sadly the hoped for collaboration between the Mead Hall Cook and Yotam Ottolenghi will not now happen.

This is entirely due to the latters insistence on knowing where the 'meat' came from.

Fucking hippy.

31.01.2026 20:29 — 👍 54    🔁 2    💬 8    📌 0

I have money on this exact outcome.

31.01.2026 20:13 — 👍 7    🔁 0    💬 1    📌 0

I've been lax my entire life.

According to sources*

*anyone who's ever known me.

31.01.2026 20:12 — 👍 5    🔁 0    💬 1    📌 0

This could be either magnificent or deeply embarrassing.

Time will tell.

31.01.2026 20:01 — 👍 25    🔁 0    💬 8    📌 0
31.01.2026 19:59 — 👍 18    🔁 0    💬 2    📌 0

FAT JESUS IS RISEN!

HALLELUJAH!

31.01.2026 19:58 — 👍 14    🔁 0    💬 2    📌 1
Post image 31.01.2026 19:56 — 👍 4    🔁 0    💬 1    📌 0
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a picture of a minion that says hippie on it ALT: a picture of a minion that says hippie on it

@mrlepus.bsky.social you're back.

31.01.2026 19:52 — 👍 18    🔁 0    💬 1    📌 0

An apt comparison.

31.01.2026 19:50 — 👍 11    🔁 0    💬 0    📌 0

RELEASE. THE. HOUNDS!

31.01.2026 19:49 — 👍 20    🔁 0    💬 6    📌 0

Thank you Stephen.

31.01.2026 19:37 — 👍 4    🔁 0    💬 0    📌 0

Run.

31.01.2026 19:35 — 👍 18    🔁 0    💬 3    📌 0

Another comparison I'm uncomfortable with Stephen.

31.01.2026 19:34 — 👍 8    🔁 0    💬 1    📌 0

Apart from the occasional wasp and Scotch pie.

31.01.2026 19:22 — 👍 2    🔁 0    💬 1    📌 0
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a close up of a brown owl with a very angry look on its face ALT: a close up of a brown owl with a very angry look on its face

No. Please.

Enlighten us.

31.01.2026 18:59 — 👍 24    🔁 0    💬 2    📌 1

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