linknarf

i’m so glad that no matter what i will always find my way back to myself

i’m having knee pain again and i’m thinking about this rn. like that bus driver saw me & still drove off.

there’s nothing more i hate seeing then weight loss content. i don’t care what yall do w ur bodies but i don’t wanna see it on my feed or me fyp.

everytime it’s a serious or really challenging scene to act in, london is playing jordan bc derek acting feels like cw (derogatory)

watching modern family & claire really is haley’s worst enemy.

just ran to the bus using knee strength i didn’t have just for the bus to leave me.

nothing can top the first couple of seasons of criminal minds. gideons character was just so good & then we got stuck w racist rossi :((

i’ve been in therapy for 2 years and honestly it feels like only a few months but also years as well? i think back to where i was at the start of my journey to now, and wow. i’m just really grateful to get to this point and i’m even more excited for the future

if i ever right a book, it would be about being annoying and how that’s protrayed vs who gets the right to be annoying

when i’m all moved in, im gonna get myself a treat! either a little cake or something cute and festive

this week i’ve been thinking a lot of about the fact that it’s been 5 years since the pandemic started. 5 years of consistent masking. it’s just been weighing on my mind

everyday i’m so thankful i’ve freed myself from watching love is blind. who ever made that show & the production company have a spot saved for them in hell

“girl dinner” and it’s just the normalization of eds & ed culture

AHHHHH i survived!! and got housing and my ID came super early. life is so good, never give up 🫶🏾🩵🩵

god is so good i just got approved for housing!!!

someone explain to me how they cancelled found but the tracker is the number one show on tv? racism is so wild

just hit 5 years sober the other day. i’m so incredibly proud of myself and thankful for my community. thank you for holding space for me & continuing to support me! love all my friends & loved ones 🫶🏾🩵🩵🩵

i’ll get this through this tough spot & come out the other side w a smile & more money in my bank.

chronic pain so bad all i can do is smile iykyk

i set alarms like i need an air horn going off to wake me up when im really a light sleeper

a group of people are standing around a man wearing glasses and a hat that says ' abercrombie ' on it ALT: a group of people are standing around a man wearing glasses and a hat that says ' abercrombie ' on it

MAKE COCO AN OG NEXT SEASON #LoveIslandUSA

being vulnerable is hard for me but i’m so thankful my friends make space and time of my emotions and feelings 🫶🏾🩵

there’s something so funny about saying me self instead of my to me.

the grace i wish you would’ve had for me, is the same grace ill continue to give myself. to allow myself to have bad days, bad moments and wallow in self pity bc i know the next day will be different. bc i know that the next week will be different. bc i know im different.

have, to enjoy, to live and to laugh too. even in my worst moments, even in the days where my sobriety is a challenge, i will always treat myself with the kindness and grace i should’ve gotten. the kind words that should’ve spoken life into me instead of tearing me apart.

and the thing that keeps me going is knowing that i’m not perfect, i’m not without mistakes, i too can be careless and harmful at times, but i’ll never be what you saw me as. i’ll never be the monster you painted me out to be. and in my recovery, in my sobriety, i know this is the life i’m meant to

and even when my happiest moments are tinged with sadness, with missing the folks who abused me, of missing the naivety i lost, the benefit of doubt i’ll never really be able to get back, i still choose this life. i still am happy and im still going to figure out what inner peace is.

i’m so thankful and grateful to be alive. i’m so thankful that i was able to survive and get to this point where i can think about thriving. where i can think about what’s next in life without feeling the weight of being consistently harmed. of being disregarded, of being controlled.

and even tho i treat this page like my own void, if any survivor of abuse across this, please know it gets better. and yes it will get worse before you can enjoy everything you once liked. and yes you have changed but that change is what kept you safe before and what will propel you to move forward

but i will contuine to remind myself that this life isn’t a burden or a consequence, but something i choose and am choosing everyday. this life im currently living and building is show of all my internal strength and then some. its a life that i not only want but i life i want to improve, day by day