Tom McLaughlin

Amused at how much phishing is pretty much just saying, “Hello, my name is Mr. Burns. I believe you have a letter for me,” like Homer Simpson.

Really excited to see the foreign policy D team’s take on regime change.

Say what you will, but the architects of the Iraq war were not dumb people. This current team is dumb people.

So… what happens if the DOJ fails to secure an indictment of Maduro?

At this point I think it is prudent to plan for the most colossal of inept fuckups.

I still can’t get used to Marjorie Taylor Greene being the person in Congress that’s most meeting the moment.

New fear unlocked: I’m the archenemy of some guy I haven’t seen or thought about for 20 years.

WTF? I stayed up for that? That was just fucking dumb and useless.

Just an old man being a whiny little bitch.

I can only imagine how dumb you must become listening to this guy over and over lie to you.

This guy loves to blame Biden for everything while conveniently forgetting much of our issues were caused by his colossal fuckup over COVID.

The absolute STUPIDEST people right now are about to get very excited.

Why do some people look good with bangs and other people just look like a fucked up lampshade?

17 year old me would be so excited to know I need to walk through the drive-thru of my local Burger King every time I want a late night whopper.

Best part of today’s flight was, “Ladies and gentlemen, as we begin our descent if you have any trash to throw out you’ll have to hold onto it. Also, the planes exits can be found at…”

I’m eating White Castle and drinking a Bud Chelada 22.

And somehow this won’t even crack the 10th percentile of ways people will physically fuck up their health today here in Vegas.

#aws #awsreinvent

Looks like I may be good. Even leaving on one of the flights I would have picked anyways.

Pretty sure I have a trip tomorrow, that I thought was Monday, and while I have a hotel I may not have actually booked the flight… 🤦‍♂️

What I hate most about the “I did my own research” crowd is now I feel like an idiot when when saying, “I literally just googled this” in an attempt to refute the most inane and pulled out of a person’s ass comments.

Nothing. The answer is nothing.

Finally answered the age old question, “Why is there pee all over this bar bathroom floor?”

I was drunk and not paying attention…

Got about 15 minutes into the new Naked Gun and just turned it off to watch Angie Tribeca instead.

Why does Gen Z have such hall monitor energy?

I ordered on the app and it took over 10 minutes. They were slammed with people wanting lame drinks at 6:30am.

Stop ordering complicated drinks at the airport Starbucks. It is neither the time nor fucking place for that.

I would like to know too.

“"Hey, did you go to Hollywood Upstairs Medical College too?"

www.reddit.com/r/simpsonssh...

Britian’s MI6 just informed me on IG how to communicate with them securely.

Honestly impressed with this communication. Including the note to use a computer not connected to you.

Crank It up (Funk Town, Pt. 1)

It’s why you’re gonna be blessed with this song. (Yes I listen to channel 54 a lot.)

open.spotify.com/track/26L7kM...

The greatest station if you’re a Sirius XM listener. Useful for finding that song stuck in your head from yesterday.

xmplaylist.com

Suzanne Swierc Let me be clear: if you think Charlie Kirk was a wonderful person, we can't be friends. His death is a tragedy, and I can and do feel for his wife and children. I believe in the Resurrection, and while it's difficult, I can and do pray for his soul. Charlie Kirk's death is a reflection of the violence, fear, and hatred he sowed. It does not excuse his death, AND it's a sad truth. The shooting is a tragedy, and I can and do feel for a college campus experiencing an active shooter situation. The deaths of Melissa and Mark Hortman, the children shot and killed in Minneapolis last month, and the children shot in Colorado today are all tragedies that also deserve your attention. Charlie Kirk excused the deaths of children in the name of the second amendment.

Here’s what a Ball State University employee said that led to their termination:

I no longer feel comfortable, expressing any political opinions on social media.

That is just absolutely fucked up.

What an amazing week in Seattle at the AWS Heroes Summit!

Heroes- you're an inspiring group, who uplift and mentor so many in your communities, while also pushing for innovation out of AWS. Thank you for all that you do, and a special shout-out to the newest Heroes🙏👏