Mars

kind of sad that im only getting into combat sports now, like i missed out on so many concussions 😔

Bodies bodies bodies!!!!

Verbally assaulted my sister the moment she let it slip she’s fucking a military man. that bitch really thought I wouldn’t notice! I had her by the throat!!! In THIS CLIMATE!! OFF!!!! YOUR!!!! KNEES!!!!!!!

Oh! Ugly crying over DMs from childhood friends who deconstructed religion!!!

Had to send an audio message to the bestie because I’m too embarrassed to admit in writing that I am a hypochondriac

lately

IT COULD BE AN EMAILLLLLL

What do you mean it’s -23° and I have an 8am in person meeting.

I suspect my long standing, public distain for America does not put me in Zuckys good graces, and therefore he’d rather just let me go, and enjoy the cesspool of boomers operating under zero fact checks.

Writhing on the floor realizing I have to text my friends now that we don’t have twitter or TikTok wtfff

Turns out, my tooth did shift! I saw God while singing the 5 little specked frogs!! 5 different forceps later and that suckers gone!

Guess what besties? What was fine a week ago is no longer okay!!! I almost vomited from pain at work, canceled the rest of my week and now have SURGGGGG Thursday

Not on my watch 🫡

Takes one to know one 💖

I will give my data to china willingly like come on you already have the patriot act, let me scroll in peace!!

Gassing up the drunk, 50 year old girlfriend of someone I never met, whose divorce was finalized 15 years ago at my partners work Christmas Party!

It went fine!! but full dental doesn’t kick in for 6 months and I made the devastating realization I will need to stay at my job until then

It was the Austin butler break up

Going to lose my mind until 10am tomorrow, but I have to remind myself this is not the first tooth I’ve chipped and if anything the other one was significantly worse (exposed nerve) and I waited a month to tell my parents when I was 11.

Born to be a psychic in the 80’s forced into whatever my job is currently.

Cried the whole morning, crashed out at lunch, not because it hurt!! I had to CALL SOMEWHERE NEW AND MAKE AN APPOINTMENT. Anyways, I did it and warned them I will not sit well so pray for me and that I am properly fucking sedated.

The new phrase is “and that’s fine… BUT-“ and then launching into sinister takes.

14 hours in the new year and I chipped a fucking tooth? (It’s in the back so whatever ya know? But it’s the principle)

Costco membership id photo makes me look like my brother

Buying weed with the Christmas money my grandparents who don’t like me begrudgingly gifted me feels right. If I’m going to be a disappointment, let’s go all out.

“Beauty is pain” I say as I spread wax on my leg with a butter knife

This is my son if you even care!!

I made a gingerbread panopticon