Ren, ︖︖ [ARCHIVED]

I'm so tired of you.

🫩

// everyone say thank you mitski and cenmili

// you do, don't you 😋

// [ breathes in ]

that one had been marinating in my draft and i'm not willing to elaborate but anyway

"Lighter?" he finally asked after Zero was done.

"𝙔𝙤𝙪'𝙫𝙚 𝙡𝙤𝙨𝙩 𝙮𝙤𝙪𝙧 𝙢𝙞𝙣𝙙. That could've gotten you killed in the field," the man offered him the lighter, regardless. Ren accepted it.

𝘐 𝘸𝘪𝘴𝘩 𝘪𝘵 𝘩𝘢𝘥.

"Lighter," he demanded. The answer was another look of disapproval from his co-worker. 𝘛𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘮𝘰𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘳 𝘩𝘦𝘯... "Zero. Come on."

"I'm not done patching you up yet. Stay. Still."

There was no regret. They had the goods in hand, all things considered.

He only regretted letting a personal target go.

"I didn't die," Ren muttered defensively as he watched his partner stormed out of the empty bar.

He felt the bartender's piercing gaze voicing his disappointment.

One hand reached for the cigarette case in his pocket and he put one between his lips.

"𝙃𝙖𝙫𝙚 𝙮𝙤𝙪 𝙡𝙤𝙨𝙩 𝙮𝙤𝙪𝙧 𝙢𝙞𝙣𝙙?"

The swordsman pinched the bridge of his nose with his good hand and sighed. How many times had he heard the same question in the past week?

"Leave him alone, Seven," the man, who tended to his wound, said to his partner.

// JOEL ❤️

// i'll get to things and replies after i'm back home, yeah? yeah... i have an hour long playlist to sing

// getting muse while going out for karaoke is CRAZY

... It depends.

"Okay," he nodded. A part of him wasn't ready to part with that memory. But if he must...

"Okay," he repeated, kissing Joel's forehead again.

"If you meet me here and you're sure that you can keep me in your life," he paused, looking at Joel. He tried to do that as much as he could. "Then, by all means. Though I must warn you, once again, it wouldn't be easy."

"Does it matter?" he asked. "Ultimately, it is your choice. If things change, you will have to hold onto the memory of our first meeting and tell me all about it."

He could only sigh and lean in to kiss Joel's forehead gently. "I know."

"I don't wish to maim," he replied. "And, yes, the very same dao."

"So you don't want to interfere with what's going on in this timeline, then?" that... seemed like a wise choice.

"Do you?" his hand cupped Joel's cheek, keeping him from looking elsewhere.

"I'm sorry," he repeated quietly. "I can't just do that. There's already one Zhang Xi here—well, Ren," he let out a soft laugh, "and Ma would have no one if I go missing."

"The... what?" he tilted his head in confusion, not sure if he caught what he just said. But sharing intel? "... Show me the way."

He's not.

"Okay," he repeated, whispering. "I've said everything I wanted to say before, I... Gods, Joel. I'm so sorry I can't stay."

His shoulders relaxed as he kissed Joel back, sweet and brief before he pulled away.

"Don't mess around, okay? Stay safe, I'm serious."

"What I mean is... you were always testing my patience, not that I mind," he said, "eight years is a long wait, but that's fine. You're worth the wait."

"I know," he forced out a chuckle, "it's just that... with you? I never know how patient I should be. Now we're here. It's unbelievable."

And not for another eight years. He knew that. He thought it was something that he accepted and yet...

"Yes," he nodded, squeezing Joel's hand. "you will."

"I wasn't expecting that," he said, a little impressed. "Can you find a way to break it somehow?"

"I guess that's a good thing," he mumbled. "... Right? It is... good."

Those were the words he used to convince himself too.