Gail

Aww, thank you for loving my husband’s extremely dumb story - I loved it, too!

Woo hoo! Do you name the one story who juuust missed the longlist, or is that meant for us to just follow the breadcrumbs…

Awww! He wrote it giggling and said “this is the stupidest thing I’ve ever written” ❤️

I want more tea on this one too! I think it might be my husband’s, based on the gifs selected in bluesky and Twitter… I’d love to see it! :)

there's an insane fox news grandma on twitter literally named "karen orlando" who angrily replies to all my posts. I started just replying that she was my "strongest soldier" whenever she did this and slowly but surely she has become kind and polite to me. it's like breaking a wild horse lol

eating an entire bag of red 40 before my bloodwork tomorrow, will send results directly to rfk

Has anyone in this family ever seen a chicken? #arresteddevelopment #wicked

Omg my husband made the same post on Facebook

CROW ON MST3K: He makes Ted Danson look like Gavin MacLeod!
ME AT 13 YEARS OLD: haha

Creep, Hell House LLC, The Lodge, Possession, Audition, Eden Lake ?

the vet called my cat handsome and I said “thank you” and really meant it

10play.com.au (or torrented, probably)

started watching Australian Survivor and it is like getting bonus seasons of early 2000s Survivor, true hate-driven revenge magic we have here ❤️

I work for a library software company and we have to be on-call for library emergencies

I’d love to use this as my out of office message

🎵 the best part of waking up
is going back to sleep 🎵

Post a gif of your comfort show

Welcome to Thanksgiving, where families who hate each other gather for the one time a year it’s acceptable to eat mashed potatoes at noon.

there is a very specific type of person who votes blue and still throws gender reveals in 2024, and you’ll find them 38 stories deep on instagram

The Lodge and Better Watch Out are my go-tos for the season

between breakfast, egg creams, and our daily quiche, the average American eats no fewer than a dozen a day - it adds up!

there is one thing I’ve done for decades and promise I will continue to do, and it’s this:

I will make fun of people who order dry scrambled eggs when out to breakfast

I don’t have anything important to say and I haven’t told a good joke in 10 years so if you’re here, welcome, you’ve added nothing to your life by following me.

Yes! Be prepared - that owl will bully you into learning.

“I showed my wife Ferris Bueller last night” sir did you clockwork orange her eyes open?

“I took my wife to Paris” okay, did you dress her and carry her onto the tarmac?

what kind of person chooses to say

“I took my partner to ____” or “I introduced my partner to ____”

instead of

“my partner and I went to ___” or “my partner and I experienced ____”

?

there’s also an emoji of a shrimp

me and my husband enjoying a nice night on bluesky

This is what Twitter used to be! We all became an honorary kid in the hall on old Twitter.

jokester