Maybe

by Min Heo

i was hungover today, but i did cardio and sauna. literally hate myself so much. we’ll get there.

i had my first period in 3+ years i’m so proud as someone who suffers from pcos… like, hell yeah my organs work heheh

drinking is fun in the moment, but it my body feel like it’s dying afterwards, and the empty calories… i gotta get back on the wagon.

i GAINED one pound, and i’m trying so hard not to lose my shit. i know last two weeks has been rough with my alcoholism/being snowed in… time to get serious.

new manicure

ima need this right neow

also, lol my bpd is so bad recently. i need stability so much. i need everything to go well.

i am getting serious about getting a job. i need a job, to move my roommate out, and deep clean my house before Sir arrives in March.

i’ve had a combo of audhd burnout AND a bpd flair the past two weeks… plz put me out of my misery.

another day being given crumbs to sustain my relationship with my Dom. imma cry my ass to sleep, again.

A rooster in a black cowboy hat, eyes shadowed in a mysterious cowboy fashion

A chicken in a tan cowboy hat, its face mostly obscured and only the beak peeking out

A rooster looking unimpressed in a black cowboy hat with a string of pearls around the brim

May I interrupt the horrors to show you pictures of my sister's chickens in cowboy hats

Blu ray menu of Bram Stoker's Dracula. Provides two options: Watch Bram Stoker's Dracula Watch Bram Stoker's Dracula with Francis Coppola.

If you press that button Francis Coppola drives to your home to watch with you.

comfort dinner. i will eat healthier tomorrow 😰

today has been terrible, it’s an over 1k calorie day. i’ve been so emotional this past week, and like… today is just so bleak. i’m making comfort food for dinner (sirloin, roasted broccoli, and mac n cheese). fuck my stupid chungus life lol.

i redownloaded Animal Crossing and i’m enjoying it so much.

i’m so scared in the world, and i really feel so lost. i feel very small and insecure.

i am not a priority to Sir, and… realizing that, makes me so sad, like my spirit is crushed. if this relationship falls apart… i really don’t want to date for a moment. i feel so insecure over my value… it sucks to sit on the back burner.

Sir reached out to me. i feel safe and secure. i know that i trust him and his decisions. i hate when im scared and insecure.

me

my roommate is home, and very drunk. if he’s a little drunk, he’s a delight, if he’s very drunk he wounds me with words. holy shit… i am sad.

i buy all my groceries from the proletariat store: Aldi

i‘ve been experiencing the worst burnout mentally. i really, i need to feel safe and secure.

my roommate is going out to dinner at the downtown square… ICE presence has been heightened this week here, and oooof… my roommate is latino. all i feel is anxiety.

also! i got groceries for the winter storm hitting us tomorrow. i hate fighting panic buyers.

i have so many doubts of the future. i fear, i will not be chosen for a while, if ever.

i absolutely loath Sir‘s other sub. i have my reasons, i will not air. i have no empathy for her.

Self-care isn't just drinking water and going to sleep early. Self-care is taking a break when things get overwhelming, saying NO to things you do not want to do, allowing yourself to cry, asking for help from those around you, doing things that make you happy. @theheadplan

i have zero groceries, and everyone is panic buying, and no one will go to the store with me. i’m going to cry so much.